Monday, September 10, 2012


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Burt hopes you’ll enjoy this bonus article about the GOP Convention, and he hopes you’ll also enjoy the regularly scheduled article: Newsweek Finally Makes News. -ed.

by Burt Prelutsky

With the Democratic convention wrapped up, I find myself wondering if Timothy Cardinal Dolan finds microphones and TV cameras as irresistible as moths find burning candles. I mean, this was an event at which the assembly clearly voiced its disapproval of putting “God” back in the Party platform. In addition, on the same night that Cardinal Dolan gave the benediction, Caroline Kennedy, after identifying herself as a Catholic, gave her unwavering support to abortion, and Barack Obama, who remains one of the few people who ever voted in favor of partial-birth abortions, accepted his party’s nomination.

The question that comes to mind is whether there is any venue, no matter how unsavory, no matter how openly offensive to Church doctrine, that Dolan would avoid so long as he was guaranteed a featured role in the proceedings. One can only wonder if next season he’ll be hosting a new TV reality show, “Celebrity Divorce Court.”

It’s puzzling that all these years after the pharmaceutical industry has provided Americans with birth control pills, morning after pills and more contraceptive devices than Margaret Sanger could ever have envisioned in her wildest dreams, Democrats are still acting as if the year is 1912 instead of 2012. The way they carry on, you have to wonder if they resent any babies being born. Liberals, who clearly have too much time on their hands, worry about snail darters, spotted owls and endangered insects, but the only mother they really seem to cherish is Mother Nature.

Alden Nowlan once observed that “The day the child realizes that all adults are imperfect, he becomes an adolescent; the day he forgives his parents, he becomes an adult.” It often seems to me that liberals never move beyond adolescence. That’s why when Romney and Ryan talk about cutting the national debt and reducing entitlements, Obama and his disciples detest them. To left-wingers, they sound like party-poopers, like the sort of people who tell you to do your homework, clean up your room and eat your vegetables. In short, they sound like grown-ups.

Obama, on the other hand, is the perennial juvenile. Nothing is ever his fault. Instead, everything is the fault of Bush, the Europeans, the Republicans, Japan’s tsunami and the Mayan calendar.

For me, one of the highlights of the Charlotte convention was hearing John Kerry, aka Mr. Ed, accusing Mitt Romney of being for something before he was against it. In what might be the greatest display of chutzpah during this generation, Kerry actually took the occasion of reminding America that he was the lummox who, during his own presidential campaign, proclaimed that he was the guy who voted for the Iraq War before he was against it.

Because independents and moderates will finally decide the election in November, and because they tend to be the most oblivious of voters, I would like to remind them that Obama came into office vowing to cut the $10 trillion national debt. Because most people can’t cope with large numbers, I want to explain what it means for America, four short years later, to now hold an IOU amounting to $16 trillion. In round numbers, it means that every single man, woman and child -- all 300 million of us -- owes roughly $53,000!

Getting back to the Charlotte convention, a popular button sported by the delegates bore the message “Once you vote black, you never go back.” What makes it so noteworthy is that it’s a take-off on a popular pickup line that black guys successfully used on naïve white girls back in the 1960s, which definitely led to a spike in pre-Roe v. Wade abortions.

Another sidebar of interest involved the keynote speaker, Julian Castro, or, more specifically, his mother, Maria del Rosario Castro, whose other twin son, Joaquin, is running for Congress. It seems that Mrs. Castro, once an activist for the openly racist La Raza, claims that Davy Crockett and his fellow Texans who fought and died defending the Alamo weren’t heroes, after all. According to the mayor’s mom, “They were a bunch of drunks and crooks and slaveholding imperialists.”

What makes her comments so remarkable, comments that haven’t been refuted by her son, Julian, is that he just happens to be the mayor of San Antonio, the home of the Alamo.

No word yet whether Mayor Castro intends to turn the historical fort into a parking garage or a minimart.

Burt hopes you’ve enjoyed this bonus article about the GOP Convention, and he hopes you’ll also enjoy the regularly scheduled article: Newsweek Finally Makes News. -ed.

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      Burt Prelutsky
      16604 Dearborn Street
      North Hills, CA 91343-3604.