Friday, March 30, 2012

LIBERAL, JUST ANOTHER WORD FOR STUPID

by BurtPrelutsky

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve asked myself how it is that so many of my fellow Americans can actually go out and vote for people as ignorant as Patty Murray, Barbara Boxer and Hank Johnson. Rep. Johnson, in case he’s slipped your mind, is the Democrat representing Georgia’s 4th congressional district, whose claim to fame is that during a House Armed Services Committee hearing, he asked Admiral Robert Willard if he shared the congressman’s concern that adding 8,000 servicemen and their families to the 175,000 civilians on the island could cause Guam to tip over and capsize.

The truth is, even if you ignore their politics, it would be hard to imagine any group of people in which this trio would not stand out by reason of their ignorance.

But just as often, I’ve found myself wondering why Fox keeps offering up the likes of Juan Williams, Leslie Marshall, Geraldo Rivera, Alan Colmes, Marc Lamont Hill and Bob Beckel. I sit at home listening to these donkeys braying the same predictable talking points to each and every question, and I find myself dismissing Fox’s claims to being fair and balanced. If that’s their intention, I say to myself, why is it they never invite some intelligent people on to present the liberal side of issues?

Then it struck me. There is no intelligent argument that can be made for liberalism. All any of them can do is parrot the same insipid sound bites dreamed up by the likes of Barack Obama, James Carville, David Axelrod, Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid and Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, and regurgitated ad nauseam by Jay Carney.

There is a very good reason why there’s nobody on the Left who is comparable to Charles Krauthammer, Mark Levin, Thomas Sowell, Brit Hume, Ann Coulter, Dennis Prager, Walter Williams, Mark Steyn, Steve Hayes, Bernie Goldberg, Harry Stein, Michael Medved, Mark Alexander, Bret Baier, Michelle Malkin and Lou Dobbs. The reason is that liberals never think for themselves. Aside from plotting how to game the system in order to steal elections, none of them ever has an original thought. Even questioning Barack Obama is regarded as an act of heresy.

What’s more, I can prove it. Every liberal in public life has called for abolishing the Second Amendment. Now why is that? I happen to know a number of liberals who own guns. What’s more, rich liberals who don’t own guns have security people on their payroll who carry them. Even anti-gun advocate Sen. Dianne Feinstein was once found to be packing a heater in her purse, and yet, with a single voice, liberals squeal for the abolition of all firearms. The only reason for all this hypocrisy is because some influential liberal along the way decided it was a divisive issue which could be used as a wedge between them and the rest of us.

How else could a Chicago punk at a San Francisco fundraiser be so certain that he would derive laughter, applause and huge campaign donations, from a bunch of limp-wristed fat cats by demeaning his betters as “those who cling to their guns and their religion”? For good measure, he was well-guarded at the event by a squad of Secret Service agents armed to the teeth.

If you still question my statement that liberalism is synonymous with stupidity, imagine a TV network whose intellectual heavyweights are Chris Matthews, Rachel Maddow, Ed Schultz and Al Sharpton, or a now defunct radio network that headlined Al Franken and Janeane Garofalo, whose combined IQ would have to climb a stepladder and then stand on its tippy toes in order to reach triple digits.

The truth of the matter is that if liberals were as smart as they claim, they’d be conservatives.

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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Wednesday, March 28, 2012

BEER SUMMIT, ANYONE?

by BurtPrelutsky

As I sit here, it has not yet been determined what actually took place in Sanford, Florida, and whether George Zimmerman will be arrested and tried for shooting Trayvon Martin. Except for Mr. Zimmerman and his friends and family, that will be of little concern. What really matters is that America’s leading racists, Barack Obama, Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson and the Black Panthers, have all had the opportunity to showboat and to show their true colors.

For good measure, as radio talk show host Dennis Prager pointed out, for the first time in its history, the New York Times identified someone, in this case Zimmerman, as “a white Hispanic.” After all, it wouldn’t be front page news if a Hispanic had shot a black or vice versa, or, as is more typical, a black had killed a white. Only by emphasizing that Zimmerman’s father was white, while ignoring the fact that his mother was Peruvian, could the Times turn this unfortunate incident into the only kind of hate crime they really care about, one in which a white man can be portrayed as evil incarnate.

Barack Obama, just as he did when there was the incident in Cambridge, Massachusetts a few years ago, immediately jumped to a racially-based conclusion. Just as Professor Henry Gates had to be right and Sgt. James Crowley and the entire Cambridge Police Department had to be wrong before anyone actually knew the facts of the matter, we had Obama solemnly intoning, “If I had a son, he would look like Trayvon Martin.” Well, I suppose he would unless, Mother Nature being the naughty pixy she sometimes is, he came out looking like your Caucasian mother.

Just in terms of public relations, wouldn’t it have been a good idea for Obama to have spoken a few well-chosen words after the 13-year-old white kid, Allen Coon, in Kansas City, was recently doused in gasoline and set on fire while the two black teenagers hollered, “You get what you deserve, white boy!”?

Isn‘t it odd that neither Sharpton nor Jackson thought it was worth their time to fly off to Kansas City and admonish the black community to shape up, and to urge the KCPD to arrest those young sadists and send them away for a long stretch? Instead, we had Al Sharpton leading a demonstration, during which he said, and I quote, “Don’t talk to us like we stupid. Don’t talk to us like we ignit.” He garnered loud cheers from a crowd of black Floridians, who clearly speak his language, even if nobody else does. He went on to say, “We love our children like you love yours.” Well, not exactly, Reverend Al. Not when three out of four black babies are born to unmarried women.

In a related matter, people seem to be in a big rush to try, convict and execute, Sgt. Robert Bales for murdering 17 Afghans, while in the meantime, Major Hasan, who massacred 13 Americans at Fort Hood in 2009, continues to await trial nearly three years after his bloody rampage, committed in the name of Allah.

In this country, it would appear, a hate crime is simply one for which a white heterosexual is responsible, never one in which he or she is the victim.

Speaking of the racist-in-chief, Barack Obama, when he’s not chastising white policemen, actually has the gall to travel around the country to promote his energy policy. Like Sharpton, who only addresses the choir, Obama makes certain that when he describes his policy as “all of the above,” nobody in his throng ever asks him why, in that case, he has declared war on the coal industry and shut down drilling for oil both offshore and on federal land.

Why does he lower the hammer on the Keystone pipeline and its 20,000 jobs, while at the same time throwing billions of our tax dollars at green energy, an industry responsible for a mere 2.4% of the jobs in America? And why does he keep insisting that we only have 22 billion barrels of oil in reserve when the government’s own geological experts put the figure at one trillion barrels? I mean, it’s one thing to employ guesswork when it comes to handicapping a basketball tournament, but quite another matter when you use a crystal ball when estimating oil reserves and miss by 978,000,000,000 barrels!

Finally, a while back, when asked to give himself an overall grade, Obama, while trying to look modest, gave himself a B+. Recently, when asked to do the same, Secretary of Energy Steven Chu gave himself an A-.

What I want to know is where were these easy graders when I was in school?

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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Monday, March 26, 2012

FOOLS, NITWITS & DUMB BUNNIES

by BurtPrelutsky

The title refers to those politicians in our nation’s capital who make our laws, oversee our wars and conduct our foreign policy. If you regard Congress as a family, this one has far more than its share of black sheep. If you regard Congress as a village, this one has far more than its share of idiots. If, on the other hand, you regard Congress as a gathering of wise and benevolent public servants, I’m afraid you, too, are a fool, a nitwit or a very dumb bunny.

Consider, if you will, that back in the 1990s, President Clinton got North Korea to agree to cease pursuing a nuclear bomb in exchange for a load of goodies that made Santa Claus look like a piker. Naturally, we later discovered that they did not hold up their end of the bargain. Can you imagine such a thing? Who would have ever guessed that a blackmailer wouldn’t keep his word?

Now, Secretary of State Clinton is over the moon because North Korea has agreed to a temporary suspension of its nuclear tests in exchange for 240,000 metric tons of food. Notice this time around, the North Koreans got us to say “Uncle!” for nothing more than a temporary agreement they have no intention of honoring.

By this time, one would think that we knew better than to send a couple of drones named Bill and Hillary to deal with these blackguards. Armed drones would clearly have a better chance of getting their attention, not to mention their cooperation.

Will we never learn that it doesn’t pay to make nice with tyrants? In exchange for getting us to deprive Poland and the Czech Republic of a missile defense system, the Russians didn’t even have to give Obama a bottle of vodka or a dancing bear.

When it comes to diplomacy, you can’t even call people like the Clintons and Obama pigeons because it would be an affront to perfectly capable birds.

In poker circles, it’s said that you never want to play cards with guys nicknamed Doc, Fingers or the Professor. In world politics, you don’t send amateurs to negotiate with guys named Putin, Ahmadinejad or Kim Jong-Un.

In other world news, we recently learned that after Obama gave Brazil two billion dollars to develop its offshore oil industry, in which George Soros just happens to have a major stake, the Brazilians are selling their oil to China. So we can add a woman, Brazilian President Dilma Rousseff, to the list of those with whom our politicians should not be playing international poker.

In spite of all the endless insults targeting rich people by Barack Obama, and at Mitt Romney, by those pinheads who are morally outraged that Mrs. Romney has not one Cadillac, but two, in her garage, Forbes reported that a recent study of all our presidents proved that, far and away, our wealthiest chief executive was none other than George Washington. So if you’re going to start hurling invective at people for no better reason than their wealth, you will have to start with the Father of Our Country.

Speaking of Barack Obama, it’s worth noting that the same man who nixed the Keystone XL pipeline praised such New Deal construction projects as Hoover Dam and the Golden Gate Bridge in his State of the Union Address.

Now, seriously, is there anyone anywhere who actually believes that Obama would have gone ahead with such massive enterprises, risking the wrath of the environmental zealots who donate a ton of money to his re-election campaign?

Let’s face it, if they get this upset over a pipeline that would only run through states they fly over, can you imagine how those lunkheads would howl if the fish life of their beloved San Francisco Bay or the desert critters hanging out near their beloved Las Vegas suffered even the slightest upheaval for the sake of people who aren’t smart, rich or lucky enough to be them?

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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Friday, March 23, 2012

EMPTYING THE ATTIC

Surprise! Burt wrote this special bonus article for you. When you've finished reading it, be sure to read the other article published today, "Wrangling With Rangel." - ed.
 
by BurtPrelutsky

In this fast-moving world, it is next to impossible to keep track of all the zany stuff that takes place on a daily, sometimes hourly, basis. It’s a lot like finding yourself in a movie whose cast combines the Three Stooges with the Four Marx Brothers.

Vladimir Lenin in Seattle?
For instance, I often find myself wondering why left-wingers continue to promote communism. I mean, speaking of people named Marx, it would be different if Karl had just recently introduced Das Kapital to the world. But that happened way back in 1867. In the intervening 145 years, as we’ve seen his philosophy morph from mere words in a book to one bloody tyranny after another in the real world, how is it that anyone can see what it has led to in Russia, China, Cuba, Cambodia, Venezuela and North Korea, and continue defending it?

In a related matter, I just learned that in the Fremont neighborhood of Seattle, there stands a 16-foot statue of Vladimir Lenin. The good news is that during Gay Pride Week, it’s dressed in drag. If you happen to be a left-wing atheist, the bad news is that it is adorned every December with Christmas lights. One can only ponder which of the two decorative motifs would have been the more offensive to the Father of the Russian Revolution.

While watching this year’s Oscar show, it occurred to me that if you were a show business celebrity, 2011 would have been a good year in which to adjourn to the Big Studio in the Sky. Judging by the number of below-the-line technicians acknowledged during the In Memoriam interlude, there were very few major names who took their leave this past year. But once the show ended, I realized that not only had gorgeous Elaine Stewart, who had lit up the screen in The Bad and the Beautiful and Brigadoon, passed away, but also my old colleague, Harry Morgan, of The Ox-Bow Incident, Dragnet and, most memorably, M*A*S*H. I can only assume that somebody at the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences had fallen asleep at the switch.

Burt missed Harry Morgan (center)
Mainly because I have spent the past six years or so hearing dire warnings about Iran’s being a year, a month or a week, away from having a nuclear bomb, I have been forced to come up with an alternate theory. I’m not suggesting that Ahmadinejad and the mullahs shouldn’t join bin Laden and Gaddafi in Hell, but I keep thinking about Leonard Wibberley’s 1955 Cold War satire, The Mouse That Roared. Briefly, the book dealt with the Duchy of Grand Fenwick, a tiny European monarchy that finds itself in economic straits. In order to rectify that situation, they decide to declare war on the United States and then to quickly surrender, figuring they will receive the sort of financial largesse that Germany received after losing World War II.

Through a strange set of amusing circumstances, they somehow manage to make off with a doomsday device along with its peace-loving inventor. In the end, Grand Fenwick puts the world on notice that they will unleash the mighty Q-bomb if the superpowers don’t come to their senses and quit rattling their atomic sabers.

While lodging his deadly invention in the bowels of Grand Fenwick’s royal castle, Dr. Kokintz discovers the Q-bomb is a dud. He wisely decides to keep that his little secret.

That is what got me thinking about Iran. If it had a nuclear bomb, would they be likely to drop it on Tel Aviv, knowing full well that it would unleash a nuclear holocaust from the United States? I’m not suggesting that the Iranians don’t hate Israel, but the fact remains that those five million Jews are worth their weight in gold to Iran, Syria, Saudi Arabia and the rest of those creepy places in the Middle East. After all, whenever something bad happens, the Arab and Muslim leaders get to blame Israel. Whenever their citizens wonder why they are poor, ill-educated and living no better than their camels, the leaders get to blame the world’s all-time favorite scapegoats, the Jews.

In a way, if Israel didn’t exist, Iran would have had to invent it.

Speaking of inventions, Obama, who despises oil and coal nearly as much as Muslims hate Jews and Christians, has now proposed that $14 million in tax dollars be used to subsidize turning algae into a bio-fuel. He hasn’t explained why if it’s possible to turn pond scum into energy, the private sector can’t be trusted to provide the funds. He has also neglected to explain why they can’t use the likes of Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, Sheila Jackson Lee, Henry Waxman and Eric Holder, in a pilot project and see if the five of them, after being properly processed, can propel a motorbike down Pennsylvania Avenue.

I only recently discovered that over and above their salary and franking privileges, every senator has an office budget of $3 million. Senator Rand Paul set a good example when he kicked back $500,000, but that still left him spending $2.5 million-a-year on a squad of sycophants. And please keep in mind that senators aren’t paying rent on their palatial office suites. In retrospect, it seems to me that our Founding Fathers went off half-cocked when they revolted over something as benign as taxation without representation.

Finally, after months of hearing people like Herman Cain, Tim Pawlenty, Michele Bachmann, Jon Huntsman, Rick Perry, Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum, running as the alternative to Romney, it will be a relief when we can all focus our attention on getting rid of the real alternative to Mitt Romney; namely, Barack Obama.

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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WRANGLING WITH RANGEL

Burt wrote a special bonus article for you today. When you finish reading this article, don't miss "Emptying the Attic." -ed.

by BurtPrelutsky

A while back, I compared Sarah Palin’s voice to bagpipes and nails on a blackboard. Predictably, a number of people leapt to her defense, while one guy of Scottish heritage leapt to the defense of bagpipes. I understand that, thanks to the media’s unrelenting attacks on Mrs. Palin, a lot of Republicans resent any criticism of their favorite Alaskan, no matter how benign. But, frankly, I can’t believe I am the only one out here who cringes every time she opens her mouth. Frankly, for conservatives, I think Palin’s annoyingly nasal voice is our own version of the emperor’s new duds.

Speaking of annoying, is there anyone less amusing and more irritating than Sacha Baron (“Borat”) Cohen? Of course when I say “anyone,” I am referring to anyone not currently holding elective office. Okay, I hear you; perhaps it is a three-way tie between Cohen, Michael Moore and Bill Maher.

The other day, a reader shared a study with me that concluded that incompetent people are not only incompetent when it comes to such things as logic and language skills, but even when it comes to their sense of humor. It seems that they really do have a tin ear, so to speak, when it comes to humor. Moreover, such people are far more likely to underestimate others, while holding themselves in ridiculously high esteem. The reverse was true when it came to competent people; ironically, they were the ones who tended to question their competence and under-rate their own abilities.

I’m not sure the study revealed anything we didn’t already sense about those people who elected Barack Obama, but it certainly explains all those terrible jokes they persist in forwarding to everyone unfortunate enough to be in their email address book.

Rep. Charles Rangel
Although it is my practice to automatically delete jokes, links and attachments, sent to me by strangers, fortunately one occasionally slips past my spam filter and my eagle eye. One such was the following: “The food stamp program, which is overseen by the Department of Agriculture, is pleased to be distributing the greatest amount of food stamps ever. Meanwhile, the Park Service, which is overseen by the Department of the Interior, asks us to please not feed the animals because they may grow dependent and not learn to take care of themselves.”

I know what you’re thinking and I agree.

In a recent article, as some of you may recall, I wrote, “After spending two million dollars and several thousand man-hours investigating Rep. Charles Rangel’s various crimes and misdemeanors, if those shmoes in Congress really wanted to impress us with their integrity, they would have thrown his sorry butt in prison. When you’re found guilty of 11 counts of misbehavior, it calls for more than a resounding tsk-tsk from your House colleagues. In certain precincts, after all, being censured by Congress is regarded as a badge of honor.”

The other day, I opened the following email from Ms. Hannah Kim: “Hello, Mr. Prelutsky: In your recent piece, you wrote… (and after quoting the paragraph above, continued) First, the Congressman did NOT commit any “crime” -- In fact, the chief counsel of the Ethics Committee concluded that there was NO EVIDENCE OF CORRUPTION and that the Congressman did not use his position to benefit himself. His most serious offense of trying to raise money for an education center in his congressional district could have been avoided if he had grabbed the correct stationary. I urge you to take out the word ‘crimes’ from your article.”

She then quoted Blake Chisam, a lawyer on the Ethics Committee, who apparently said, “I believe that the congressman, quite frankly, was overzealous in many of the things he did. And sloppy in his personal finances.”

In writing back, I resisted the temptation to point out that she meant “stationery,” not “stationary.” Instead, I wrote: “Dear Ms. Kim: When we civilians are ‘sloppy in our personal finances,’ which, in Rep. Rangel’s case included chiseling on his income taxes, it’s a crime and we’re fined and we go to jail. I see that you are Rep. Rangel’s Communications Director, and here I thought you were just a concerned citizen.”

Ms. Kim, obviously being the sort of upstanding person who believes in earning her salary, wrote back to say, “None of his violations were intentional, but made unknowingly. We all make mistakes. He is 81. The Congressman is a genuinely great person; and contrary to what you may think, he does not line his pockets. In fact, I wake up each day thanking God for the great honor to work for Mr. Rangel. FYI, I almost died from a car accident and take life very seriously.”

I replied: “Dear Ms. Kim: Rep. Rangel is fortunate to have such a loyal employee. Speaking as someone who is not on his payroll, I acknowledge that we all make mistakes. Even I, and I’m just a kid of 72. However, the way mistakes work for those of us who aren’t in Congress is sometimes they’re in our favor and quite often they’re not. However, it appears that all of Mr. Rangel’s mistakes, aside from the votes he casts, profited him in a very real way. I am glad you recovered, but just for the record, I, too, take life seriously. Which also happens to be the way I take the transgressions of those fortunate enough to be endowed with the public trust.”

For good measure, confirming Ms. Kim’s bona fides as a liberal partisan, she concluded her message by providing a list of 11 Republican congressmen who continue serving in Congress in spite of “reports” and “allegations.”

I didn’t bother pointing out the differences between allegations and convictions. Maybe next time.

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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Wednesday, March 21, 2012

LUNACY AT LARGE

by BurtPrelutsky

I don’t believe I am the only American who gets sick to his stomach every time one of our presidents or generals prostrates himself to Islam. Recently, when it was discovered that Muslim prisoners in Afghanistan had been scribbling messages to one another in their Korans, the books were confiscated and burned. In retaliation, Muslims rioted and murdered six American soldiers. And how did we react? We bowed and scraped and apologized to Hamid Karzai. In the past, it would have made as much sense if members of our military had burned copies of such texts as the Protocols of Zion or “Mein Kampf” and an American president had curtsied and begged forgiveness of Czar Nicholas II or Adolf Hitler.

The way I see it, Ahmadinejad has it all wrong; we’re not the big Satan; we’re the little punk. Jihadists are free to mark up their copies of the Koran; Egyptians are allowed to burn New Testaments and slaughter Christians; Iran is allowed to threaten Israel with nuclear extinction and execute Yusef Nardakhani for apostasy, a fancy word meaning that he had the good sense to convert from Islam to Christianity.

Devout Muslims, in their warped sense of honor, are encouraged to sell their children into slavery or murder them, and mutilate their girls with clitorectomies. But Christian and Jewish Americans are repeatedly told that we are supposed to respect their religion. Why on earth would a civilized human being respect a religion that murders people in the name of Islam over a cartoon or a stuffed toy a child asked to have named Mohammad?

If we were in prison, Islam would be Bubba and we’d be his bitch.

One of the few pieces of good news out of the Middle East is that we haven’t rushed in to arm the so-called rebels in Syria. I would have been in favor of ridding the world of Bashar al-Assad, but if the Arab Spring has taught us anything, it is that we should never expect any good to come of an uprising in that part of the world. There may be something sillier we can do than arm the Muslim Brotherhood, but off the top of my head I can’t imagine what it might be.

Although things aren’t nearly as toxic in America as they are in some places, it’s merely a matter of degree. For instance, even though I’m not a Catholic, I was offended at Obama’s attempt to force Catholic-run institutions to provide contraception devices and abortions for their employees. Even Obama’s “compromise,” which would force insurance companies to provide them, is nothing but political sleight of hand. After all, the insurance companies would simply pass along the cost to the rest of us. Included in “the rest of us” are millions of American Catholics.

On the other hand, the Catholic Bishops supported ObamaCare, and helped sell the scam to their parishioners, so there is a bit of divine justice in the present cockup. As someone once observed, the Devil’s in the details.

Although there is a part of me that’s been enjoying Bill O’Reilly’s nightly rants attacking the major oil companies--namely the part that enjoys seeing his face turn into a ripe red tomato-- as usual he’s overlooking a glaring fact. Oil companies have staggering earnings, but it’s because they deal in such enormous volume. But they also have huge expenses. It’s not cheap to seek out oil deposits, set up rigs and drill for the stuff, transport it to refineries, refine it and then transport the finished product to all those thousands of pumps. As a result, their profit margin is somewhere in the range of two to four cents a gallon. On the other hand, gasoline taxes, which include local, state and federal, range from a low of 26 cents per gallon in Alaska to 66 cents in California, with a national average just under half a dollar.

The battle over Affirmative Action is underway once again because a young woman, Abigail Fisher, is suing the University of Texas. Apparently, in spite of her superior test scores, she was denied admission in order to accommodate black and Hispanic students.

The last time the Supreme Court was asked to rule on this matter, which was roughly a decade ago, they decided that race could continue to play a role in such decisions, but not an overriding role, and that at some later date, they might reconsider it. It seems that day has finally arrived.

The good news is that Sandra Day O’Connor is gone, replaced by Samuel Alito, and Elena Kagan has decided to recuse herself because she was on record, as the U.S. solicitor general, as being in favor of Affirmative Action.

In 2007, the Court struck down similar programs in public high schools. In their decision, the majority concluded with the line, “The way to stop discrimination on the basis of race is to stop discriminating on the basis of race.” One can hardly be more succinct or logical.

Once the Supremes take care of that piece of business, they will then be able to move on to the question of free in-state college tuitions for the children of illegal aliens. Not only is it discriminatory, but it flies in the face of the law that states people are not allowed to profit from the commission of a crime.

Finally, was I the only person who imagined the following exchange taking place between movie director, and close personal friend of Fidel Castro and Hugo Chavez, Oliver Stone and one of his Hollywood stooges?

Stooge: “Did you hear the news, Mr. Stone? Your son, Sean, has converted.”

Stone: “Oh, no! Not that! Get me a razor. I’m going to slit my wrists!”

Stooge: “You’re that upset that he went to Iran, became a Muslim and changed his name to Ali?”

Stone: “Oh, for crying out loud! I thought you meant the kid had become a Republican. Go get me a beer.”

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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Liberals: America’s Termites Profiles of Success (60 candid conversations with 60 Over-Achievers)

Monday, March 19, 2012

PROSTITUTES, DRUGGIES & UNWED MOTHERS

by BurtPrelutsky

There is a widely-held belief in this country that there are such things as victimless crimes, but that is essentially a myth. Anything that tears at the moral fabric of society makes victims of us all. You don’t have to be an evangelical or Rick Santorum to acknowledge that prostitution and drug addiction not only destroy the lives and souls of those who indulge in the buying and selling of their bodies and the baking of their brains, but wrecks the lives of their friends and family.

I would add that the millions of children born to unwed mothers are even more destructive to society. For one thing, those who prostitute themselves and take part in the illegal drug trade are very likely to be people who grew up in just such homes. I am not ignoring the fact that these women did not give birth through some magical or miraculous process. On the contrary, I would make it a law that every time an American baby is born, the father’s name goes on the birth certificate and that he be compelled to pay child support. If the mother happens to be in doubt as to his identity, a blood test would be provided to all the likely suspects.

A recent study showed that 53% of women under the age of 30 giving birth are unwed. Among black women, the number soars to 73%. One could make a case for the fact that a great many female celebrities provide role models for these women, but the problem is that the ladies who make millions of dollars acting and singing can afford to pay nannies to raise their children. The poor schnooks who idolize these sluts tend to be ignorant and penniless, pretty much guaranteeing that their offspring will wind up equally ignorant, penniless and, more than likely, wards of the state, whether in or out of jail.

In much the same way that these young women identify with wealthy Hollywood pinheads, young male drug addicts tend to identify with irresponsible rock stars. The difference is that the young wannabes with their air guitar fantasies generally only manage to screw up their own lives, whereas the young women are placing a curse on their babies similar to those curses in the old fairy tales leveled by disgruntled old crones.

With the exception of pedophiles, there is no group responsible for more child abuse than these selfish young women and the irresponsible sperm donors they take up with.

A Boston firefighter recently took me to task because of my frequent attacks on public sector unions. Typically, he tried to pretend that there is no difference between trade unions and the sort of union he belongs to, and accused me of hypocrisy because as a TV writer, I had to join the Writers Guild of America.

I replied that the difference is that when public sector unions negotiate, they’re not dealing with an opposition looking to smack them down and bleed them dry. When the members of the WGA periodically went on strike against the producers, networks and studios, neither side wanted to give an inch because the money was coming out of their own pockets. That’s why one of our last strikes lasted nearly six months.

However, when the public sector unions negotiate, the folks on the other side of the bargaining table are politicians, who are only too happy to capitulate, knowing that in exchange for tax dollars which cost them nothing, they are buying gratitude that will show up in the form of future votes and campaign donations.

Public sector unions, as I tried to explain to the firefighter, are on a collision course with reality. Thanks to the inflated salaries and pensions spineless politicians have given them, the golden goose is already on the chopping block, just waiting for the economy to finally go bust, much like it has in Greece.

Some dire consequences are unintended, others such as allowing Civil Service employees to unionize, turning a blind eye to the soaring illegitimate birth rate or electing a community organizer to the Oval Office, are both predictable and inevitable.

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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Friday, March 16, 2012

WILL $4 A GALLON GAS DO THE TRICK?

by Burt Prelutsky

I keep hearing people insist that Obama will win re-election in a cake walk. Frankly, I don’t believe it. According to the polls in September, 2008, he would have lost to John McCain, who ran as lousy a presidential campaign as Bob Dole and Michael Dukakis. So what has Obama done since then that would give him an edge in 2012? ObamaCare? Cash for Clunkers? Fast and Furious? Solyndra? A $16 trillion dollar deficit? Nixing the Keystone pipeline that would have brought us thousands of jobs and oil from a friendly source? Turning the likes of Van Jones, Valerie Jarrett, Jacob Lew and Kathleen Sebilius, into czars? Kowtowing to the Saudis, George Soros and the unions?

He demands civility from conservatives and then keeps his yap shut when the likes of Maxine Waters, Henry Waxman, Nancy Pelosi and Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, vilify and demonize not only political opponents like John Boehner and Eric Cantor, but Republicans in general and Tea Party patriots specifically.

It has been apparent for months that Obama, who ran as a man who would unite all of us, intends to drop the camouflage this time around and run a presidential campaign that divides Americans by race, religion and income. The question that comes to mind is why, with a Republican House and what is expected to be a Republican Senate, Obama even seeks a second term. Can it be that he and Michelle are so enamored of the presidential perks of free travel, paid vacations to exotic locales, galas with celebrities at the White House and never having to stand in line to shoot a round of golf, that nothing else counts?

There is also the matter of being in the spotlight. Some people just can’t get enough of it. Although most of us would weary of being the focus of so much attention, being constantly eyeballed by the media, the public and the Secret Service, there are certain strange creatures who crave it the way normal human beings crave oxygen.

If the cost of gasoline is what it takes for voters to wake up and smell the fire and brimstone emanating from the Oval Office, I can only hope that the price keeps rising through Election Day.

Speaking of those in the public eye, what is it that makes so many people lose all sense of perspective when it comes to the death of a celebrity? Over the past 15 years, we’ve seen millions of seemingly normal people take leave of their senses simply because Lady Di, Michael Jackson and now Whitney Houston, have died. Why is it that we make so much of the passing of a one-time English royal; an entertainer who managed to give plastic surgery almost as bad a name as pedophilia; and a singer who destroyed her life with alcohol and cocaine? What is it in our collective DNA that inflates their passing to such an enormous degree?

Why, when we barely notice the death of medical researchers who cure our most dreaded diseases; of writers and composers whose creativity revives our culture; of military warriors who sacrifice their lives to ensure our liberty; do we carry on like those poor souls in North Korea who are severely disciplined if their public grieving doesn’t quite hit the mark?

For that matter, why does Governor Chris Christie order the lowering of flags throughout New Jersey just because Whitney Houston happened to have been born in Newark? I mean, if you lower it for a drug addict, how will you not lower it when people such as Buzz Aldrin, Andrew Napolitano, Shaquille O’Neal, John Travolta, Sam Alito, Bill Parcells, Bruce Springsteen, Eva Marie Saint, Michael Douglas, Al Leiter, Jerry Lewis, Meryl Streep, Joe Thiesmann, Frankie Valli, Joe Pantoliano, Bebe Neuwirth, Bret Baier, Jason Alexander, Joe Pesci and Antonin Scalia, eventually cast off their mortal coil? And what about Nathan Lane, Martha MacCullum and even Pia Zadora?

And if Whitney Houston deserves such recognition, what about Barney Frank? I mean, you and I might regard him as a national embarrassment, but when he retires at the end of his current term, in order, I assume, to devote more time to perfecting his Elmer Fudd impression, he will have spent 32 long years in Congress.

Believe me, I know how utterly preposterous honoring Rep. Frank sounds to most people.

Still, if Governor Christie isn’t going to have any standards for such state tributes beyond the ability to carry a tune while stoned out of one’s gourd, I’d suggest he consider just leaving the flag at half-mast.

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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Wednesday, March 14, 2012

CATALOGING LIARS & LOONS

by BurtPrelutsky

At times, I find myself wondering if, after a thousand postings, I will eventually run out of things to carp, whine and scream about. I should only be so lucky, for it would mean that liberalism had finally all but vanished from our nation’s capital, and the likes of Barack Obama, Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, Maxine Waters, Henry Waxman, Sheila Jackson Lee, Patty Murray, Charles Schumer and Pat Leahy, had all been returned to the various zoos from which they’d been on loan.

In the spirit of bi-partisanship, I would acknowledge that there are a fair number of naïve bumpkins in both parties. Although they are far more numerous in the voting blocs of Democrats, even in the GOP there are those I refer to as Utopians. Whereas on the Left, such lunkheads tend to think that if only a thousand more laws are enacted, we will achieve Nirvana; on the Right are those who believe there is an ideal presidential candidate who will somehow combine the best elements of George Washington, Abe Lincoln and Ronald Reagan. Anything short of that and they threaten to stay home and sulk on Election Day, even if the alternative is to allow an international disaster like Obama to be re-elected.

Another source of annoyance is the U.S. military. While I continue to respect and admire the young warriors who risk life and limb on our behalf, Bill Clinton’s influence on the armed forces has begun to show in various unpleasant ways. When nothing was done about Major Nidal Hasan prior to his massacring dozens of innocent people, when every single one of his superior officers at Fort Hood knew they had a committed jihadist in their midst, it’s because Clinton had filled the officer ranks with men like himself, politically correct cowards.

It then took Barack Obama, whose contempt for the military has been made blatantly clear by his gutting of defense funding, to further demoralize the troops by ending the policy known as “Don’t Ask/Don’t Tell.” In his latest attempt to neuter the troops, he has overseen a program that insists that combat troops wear fake breasts and “empathy” bellies so they’ll understand how pregnant soldiers feel during physical training. Apparently, nobody has bothered pointing out that pregnant soldiers have no place in the military, unless it’s typing, filing and/or nursing. And because I wouldn’t want to risk being labeled a sexist, I would say that holds true whether the expectant mother is male or female.

But what else would you expect of a president who recently announced a plan to diminish our nuclear stockpile by 80% at the same time that China, North Korea and Iran, are all rattling their nuclear sabers?

As bad as Clinton and Obama have been, the Democrats have been lousing up this country going back at least as far as Woodrow Wilson, whose contempt for the Constitution rivaled his contempt for black people, a century ago. More recently, we had FDR, who long before Rahm Emanuel observed that a crisis is a terrible thing to waste, used the excuse of the Great Depression to introduce socialism to America and massively expand the size and power of the federal government.

It would be unfair to overlook Lyndon Baines Johnson and his own updated version of FDR’s “New Deal,” which he called “The Great Society.” LBJ, who wreaked havoc on our foreign policy by doubling down on the Vietnam War, did similar damage to us domestically. His Civil Rights Bill gave us Affirmative Action, which sold itself as the first step towards a colorblind society, when in fact it actually condoned reverse-racism.

At the time, LBJ’s policy led Sen. Daniel Patrick Moynihan to point out: “If you create government incentives that make it more profitable for people to abandon their children than to stay with them, which is exactly what Aid to Families with Dependent Children did, you will reap the demographic whirlwind.”

Moynihan was tragically prophetic, as borne out by the poverty, crime and out of wedlock birthrate that has ravished black communities, making two-parent homes nearly as rare as teeth on a chicken.

Yet another unintended but predictable consequence of the Great Society is known as the 1965 Voting Rights Act. Because certain states had been guilty of disenfranchising blacks of their voting privileges either through Poll Taxes, Jim Crow laws or physical intimidation, it was decided that they would be overseen by Big Brother in the form of the Department of Justice.

As a result, such states as Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, Georgia, Louisiana, Mississippi, South Carolina, Texas and Virginia, along with certain counties in California, Florida, New York, North Carolina and South Dakota, and a handful of townships in Michigan and New Hampshire, would have to seek federal approval to not only amend any of its voting laws, but to move polling venues from a church to a school or a school to a private home.

In spite of the fact that blacks have had no problem being elected to public office in any of those places, the law has been renewed four times over the past 47 years, most recently in 2006 when George W. Bush, no doubt currying favor with Ted Kennedy, signed a 25-year extension! The tragic irony of all this is that the man currently heading up the Justice Department is Eric Holder, the same self-righteous bigot who refused to indict the Black Panthers for threatening white voters in 2008 and who, for good measure, instructed his agents not to prosecute cases of voter intimidation unless, of course, it involved whites threatening blacks or Latinos.

Perhaps on the day that our next president nullifies ObamaCare, he can also rid us of that toxic item.

I was actually referring to the Voting Rights Act, not to Attorney General Holder. But on second thought….

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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Monday, March 12, 2012

A FEW MORE REASONS TO SEND OBAMA PACKING

by BurtPrelutsky

I sometimes think that Republicans are genetically compelled to bring water pistols to a gun fight. While I acknowledge that it’s difficult to combat the bully pulpit the Left commands, thanks to a corrupt media, I really am sick and tired of hearing Mitch McConnell referring to “Our friends on the other side of the aisle.” Harry Reid is not your friend. Charles Schumer, Patrick Leahy and Dick Durbin, are not your friends. What’s more, Barbara Boxer, Patty Murray and Dianne Feinstein, are not going to the prom with you. Get over it.

What I would like to know is why it is that the Democrats get to conduct recall campaigns against Governor Scott Walker and his Republican colleagues in the Wisconsin state legislature, but Republicans never return the favor. When liberal governors and left-wing state legislators push for same-sex marriages, ObamaCare and abortions on demand for 14-year-olds, why aren’t we forcing them to devote their time and money to fighting recall elections?

How is it that when liberal members of state senates and assemblies roll over during negotiations with public service unions, driving their states into inevitable bankruptcy, they do so with impunity? I understand they are not motivated by a commitment to the labor movement, but because they want to be able to count on union volunteers and union funds when they inevitably run for re-election. But why don’t we ever disrupt the honeymoon by recalling their sorry carcasses?

I’d also like to know why no Republican in Congress ever accuses Obama of anything worse than incompetence. When it comes to making repairs around the house, I’m incompetent. When it comes to figuring out why my computer does some of the mischievous things it does, I’m incompetent. However, when, at the very same time that China, North Korea and Iran, are all building up their armies and increasing the stockpile of nuclear bombs in the hands of madmen, Obama is gutting the U.S. military and promising to reduce our nuclear arsenal by 80%, that can’t be explained away as mere incompetence. Let’s face it, if a foreign power had the ability to lower our defense capability that easily, they’d leave us no option but to declare war on them.

For all the nonsense about respecting the Office of the President, when the commander-in-chief insists on surrounding himself with the likes of Eric Holder, Van Jones, Kathleen Sibelius, Valerie Jarrett and Jacob Lew, he deserves about as much respect as George Soros or any of those Occupy Wall Street creeps defecating on the sidewalk.

Last year, Obama came up with a budget that was so odious that even his cronies in the Senate voted it down unanimously. Not one to take “No” for an answer, he came back this year with a budget that raised taxes on people in America who make over a million dollars a year, while not asking a plugged nickel from the 47% who don’t pay a dime in income taxes.

He also proposed raising capital gains taxes by 30% and taxing stock dividends at the same rate as regular income. It’s a one-two punch that would destroy the Stock Market. Even Obama’s good friend Warren Buffet wouldn’t invest under those conditions. What’s more, he would probably fire that secretary he’s always yakking about.

Not satisfied with destroying Wall Street, Obama also wants to destroy Main Street by raising taxes on small businesses.

And lest anyone think that they can evade the grasp of the IRS by simply dying, he wants to raise death taxes from 35% to 45%. Under his tax policy, you not only can’t take it with you, you can’t even leave it behind.

What is so confounding about all this is that Obama owes so much to Wall Street, having been the biggest recipient of campaign donations from banks and lending institutions in the history of American politics. And as an Illinois politician, he knows better than most how indebted the Democrats are to dead people for their loyal support down through the years. This is obviously one dog that believes in biting the hands that feed it.

To top things off, we have to listen to Press Secretary Jay Carney telling us, on behalf of Obama, that we didn’t know how bad the economy was when candidate Obama swore to cut the national debt in half by the end of his first term. And yet, if memory serves, in 2008, it was his boss who declared, “I think we all know that we are in the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression.”

I wasn’t too crazy about Obama’s “Hope and Change” slogan in 2008 and I’m not overly fond of his new one, “Winning the Future.” Still, there’s something to be said for its initials. WTF, indeed!

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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Friday, March 9, 2012

TODAY, GEORGETOWN; TOMORROW, THE WORLD

Recent events inspired Burt to write this bonus article for you. After you’ve read this one, be sure to read the scheduled article, A POTPOURRI FOR OUR TIMES.-ed.

by BurtPrelutsky

By this time, anyone who’s interested knows that Sandra Fluke wasn’t just another young law student at Georgetown, but in fact was a 30 year old left-wing political activist who enrolled at the Catholic university in order to crusade on behalf of publicly funded contraception and abortion.

Because the 800-pound gorilla of conservative radio, Rush Limbaugh, made the mistake of calling her a few names, he turned this otherwise insignificant ditz into the media’s idea of a martyr. Unlike Joan of Arc, however, the only voice Ms. Fluke heard in her head was her own, which, being a liberal, she naturally assumed was God’s.

Her sleazy motives for enrolling at a Catholic school aside, she made a terrible spokeswoman for Obama’s war on matters of conscience and religious freedom. Even if you are one of those airheads who agree with Obama that his frontal attack on the 1st Amendment is really all about women’s health, you should be annoyed with Fluke. For one thing, the tuition at Georgetown runs $45,000-a-year, meaning that three years of Law School is running her, or, more likely, her folks, $135,000, not counting room and board. Whatever your politics may be, it’s pretty hard to imagine that whoever is writing the checks to Georgetown can’t also afford to pay for her birth-control pills.

For another thing, she even lied about the cost. She whined that if the federal government, otherwise known as the taxpayers, didn’t supply her with free pills, the three year cost would be $3,000. Frankly, I had no idea if that was true, but to me, the difference between $135,000 and $138,000 seemed rather inconsequential, and certainly nothing that called for a congressional hearing. However, after doing a little research, I found that a six-month supply of Yasmin, a popular generic birth-control pill, runs $89.98, plus shipping. Which means that, instead of $1,000 a year, the cost would be $179.96, and while we all know that shipping isn’t always as cheap as we’d like, it’s highly unlikely that it would run Ms. Fluke anything close to $820.04-a-year.

In other words, while Ms. Fluke is probably not a slut or a prostitute, as Limbaugh suggested, she is certainly a great big fibber. And if I were her parents, I’d certainly want to know why she is leading such an active sex life when she should be hitting those expensive law books.

Speaking of Mr. Limbaugh, in the wake of the media firestorm that greeted his inflammatory words, several of his radio advertisers jumped ship before trying to jump back aboard. However, the biggest problem with reacting too quickly in these situations is that it calls attention to sponsors in ways they’d much rather avoid. For instance, one of the advertisers that leapt before it looked is Carbonite. Before turning the spotlight on itself, all that we knew is that it was one of those companies that provides backup for computers.

But by jumping into the brouhaha, it led some of us to discover that its president is a guy named David Friend, who’s been a generous contributor, it turns out, to the presidential campaigns of Al Gore, John Kerry and Barack Obama, as well as to George Soros’ MoveOn.org. What’s more, Mr. Friend, whose bizarre sense of chivalry compelled him to rush to Ms. Fluke’s defense, continued advertising on Ed Schultz’s show even after that goof referred to Laura Ingraham as a slut.

If I were Mr. Friend, I think I would be making an appointment with a vocational guidance counselor. After all, when you’ve been personally responsible for thousands of Rush Limbaugh’s fans finding a non-Carbonite way of protecting their computer files, it’s time to turn in your keys to the corner office and the executive bathroom.

Next to anticipating Mitt Romney’s victory over Barack Obama, my favorite pastime this year is watching Democrats carving up their liberal colleagues as a result of redrawn districts. I have already written about the blood-letting I witnessed when Rep. Brad Sherman went mano-a-mano with Rep. Howard Berman out here in Los Angeles. The only thing that could have improved the event is if it had been held in an arena filled with lions.

More recently, we’ve had the spectacle of Rep. Dennis Kucinich battling and losing a primary to longtime liberal House ally, Marcy Kaptur. Best of all, in the aftermath, we got to hear him whining about all her dirty tricks.

Frankly, I’ll miss Kucinich. After all, even for a liberal, he achieved notable distinction as a buffoon. As far back as 1977, when he was the 31-year-old mayor of Cleveland, he got national attention when Cleveland became the first major city since the Great Depression to go bankrupt.

During his 16 years in Congress, proving that Cleveland was no fluke, he helped the Democrats do their level best to bankrupt the United States. In 2008, during his bid to win the Democratic nomination, he decided to mention that he had seen a UFO. When skeptics weighed in, he defended himself by pointing out that Jimmy Carter had also seen one. Being Dennis Kucinich, he failed to understand that most sane people would more likely believe that Carter had arrived here on a UFO than that he had merely seen one.

Finally, just when I had given up trying to figure out why, if gold just keeps getting more and more valuable, all those guys on TV are so anxious to exchange it for worthless greenbacks, I started hearing from people trying to get me to invest in diamonds. What I’d like to know is what makes them such a great buffer against inflation. After all, the value of an item is generally determined by its scarcity. Well, since every day, diamond miners are digging up a new supply, and, as we’ve been told for decades that diamonds are forever, it strikes me that their price should be going down, not up. It’s only common sense.

The only thing I can figure out is that they’re waiting for me to invest before the diamond market finally adjusts and the price of carats becomes the same as that of carrots.

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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Liberals: America’s Termites Profiles of Success (60 candid conversations with 60 Over-Achievers)

A POTPOURRI FOR OUR TIMES

Current events have inspired Burt to write a bonus article. After you finish enjoying this one, please enjoy TODAY, GEORGETOWN; TOMORROW THE WORLD.-editor.

by BurtPrelutsky

When people insist they are turned off by negative campaigning, they lie. They can’t help it. It sounds like something they’re expected to say, just like they’re supposed to be turned off by sex and violence in movies and TV. But without screen violence, John Wayne, Gary Cooper, Jimmy Cagney, Humphrey Bogart, Richard Widmark, Bruce Willis, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Matt Damon and Russell Crowe, would have wound up pumping gas or selling insurance for a living.

As for sex, if people disapproved of it the way they always claim, pornography wouldn’t be one of the five largest industries in America, the bathing suit issue of Sports Illustrated wouldn’t sell out every year and Hugh Hefner would be a retired shoe salesman living quietly in a Chicago suburb.

“I do not choose to run.’
The fact is, negative campaigning works. Mainly it works because it’s fact-based, unlike the pipe dreams the politicians try to sell us when they promise to cut the size and power of government. As any sane person realizes, it goes entirely against human nature for a person to seek the presidency or a Senate seat and actually want to have a smaller staff, a tinier office and less influence, than his predecessor. It doesn’t matter whether that someone is a Republican or a Democrat, either.

The fact remains that one of the very few American politicians who ever left Washington, D.C., under his own steam and not because he was forced to by term limits or the certainty of losing his next election was George Washington.

Regarding the current state of the nation, nothing I’ve come across lately sums it up so well as a message I came across from an anonymous source: “The problems we face today exist because the people who work for a living are out-numbered by the people who vote for a living.”

The state of hypocrisy that exists in our nation’s capital can be summed up by the fact that when, in his State of the Union address, Obama said it was time that members of Congress curtailed their involvement in insider trading, they gave him a standing ovation. They then patted themselves on the back a month later when they voted to make it illegal to engage in a practice that has long been a felony for civilians, such as Martha Stewart.

After spending two million dollars and several thousand man-hours investigating Rep. Charles Rangel’s various crimes and misdemeanors, if these shmoes really wanted to impress us with their integrity, they would have thrown his sorry butt in prison. When you’re found guilty of 11 counts of misbehavior, it calls for more than a resounding tsk-tsk from your House colleagues. In certain precincts, after all, being censured by Congress is regarded as a badge of honor.

Speaking of prison, isn’t it time we stopped saying that some felon has paid his debt to society just because he’s gone to jail for four or five years? Although certain crimes diminish society at large, crimes are committed against actual people, not in a vacuum. If you’ve raped a woman, molested a child or murdered another human being, there’s no way that you’ve cleared your debt to them by spending a few years in jail, working out in the gym and watching cable TV. What’s more, there’s no way that you ever can.

Just because the law, so often an ass, as Charles Dickens observed, says you are now free to walk among civilized people, by all rights you should be marked like Cain so that forever after, people would know the evil you had done.

Although most of us are aware that Dickens was a fount of wisdom and common sense, another historical figure who has rarely been given his due was our own Calvin Coolidge. It was he who once said, “Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan ‘Press on’ has solved and will always solve the problems of the human race.”

Coolidge was also the fellow who when asked what the clergyman who preached on sin had said about it, quipped, “He said he was against it.”

When asked if repayment for World War I debts by England and others should be pursued, Coolidge said, “They hired the money, didn’t they?”

Although he was nicknamed “Silent Cal,” he wasn’t a mute, he simply didn’t think that just because he was the President, he had to constantly be delivering pompous, self-serving, speeches.

And, for good measure, he’s one of the very few presidents who followed George Washington’s sterling example; he left the White House of his own volition and didn’t make a big deal of it. When asked if he planned to run for re-election in 1928, he simply said, in typical Coolidge fashion, “I do not choose to run.”

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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Liberals: America’s Termites Profiles of Success (60 candid conversations with 60 Over-Achievers)

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

A FEW POLITICAL FACTS OF LIFE

by BurtPrelutsky

In presidential election years, everyone turns into a seer, a reader of tea leaves. People in the prediction business dust off their crystal balls and in a single year, pollsters like Rasmussen, Luntz and Zogby, fund their children’s college educations.

The obvious reason that elections are so hard to handicap is that unforeseen things happen. Wars break out, old girl friends come out of the woodwork, housing bubbles burst. A lot of people now forget, but in September of 2008, John McCain led Barack Obama in the polls.

To me, the amazing thing is that Republican candidates remain competitive. When you realize that as far back as a hundred years ago, progressives such as Woodrow Wilson and Teddy Roosevelt were gaming the system, it’s a miracle that Republican presidents have been elected as often as they have. When you factor in the number of people who, thanks to FDR and LBJ, have been made dependents of the federal government, it’s a wonder that the GOP hasn’t been turned into a minor entity on the order of the Libertarian Party.

On top of all that, you have teachers and professors who have devoted their lives to convincing their young charges that people like Fidel Castro, Che Guevara and Hugo Chavez, are heroes, while the likes of George Washington, James Madison and Thomas Jefferson, were nothing better than slave owners. Compounding their mischief has been a media so corrupt that the only news they can be trusted to report honestly are sports scores and yesterday’s weather.

The late Ben Hecht, playwright, screenwriter and newspaper reporter, once observed, “Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell time by watching the second hand of a clock.”

Mark Twain was even more cynical in his analysis, declaring that people who didn’t read newspapers were uninformed, whereas those who read them were misinformed. And back when those guys were “ink-stained wretches,” as reporters were affectionately labeled, newspapers were far better than they are today, if only because guys like Hecht and Twain were writing for them.

Lest anyone think that I don’t pay any attention to polls, let me assure you that I pay so much attention they have lost the ability to fool me. For instance, we keep seeing polls that indicate that Obama is running far ahead of Santorum, Gingrich, Romney and Paul, in head-to-head match-ups. That is intended to take the wind out of Republican sails, but it shouldn’t. For one thing, they tend to show Obama leading, say, Romney 48%-43% or Santorum 47% to 41%. But Obama’s actual opponent hasn’t yet been nominated. The GOP primaries are still pitting four guys against each other, so that Republicans haven’t yet had a chance to accept the fact that their favorite didn’t cop the trophy. Until that happens, they can’t possibly coalesce behind the party’s eventual standard bearer. Keep in mind that it wasn’t until June, 2008, that the Democrats finally saw Obama emerge victorious from his year-long cat fight with Mrs. Clinton.

The other reason that liberals can’t take too much satisfaction from these numbers is that when an incumbent isn’t scoring well over 50% in a head-to-head poll, the chances are he won’t win re-election. After all, he’s the known quantity. He’s the guy with an actual record to run on. But when your record includes Cash for Clunkers; a trillion dollar Stimulus that didn’t stimulate anything but the Federal Reserve printing presses; the universally dreaded ObamaCare; billions of tax dollars funneled to green energy companies that proceeded to go bankrupt; a Department of Justice that sold guns to Mexican gangsters, but refused to indict black thugs who intimidated white voters; that placed a couple of left-wing dingbats like Sonia Sotomayor and Elena Kagan on the Supreme Court; that took a $10 trillion deficit and ran it up to $16 trillion in three short years; your only recourse is to cynically divide Americans and run a Hugo Chavez style campaign.

It’s one thing, after all, to try to keep your job. In this economy, most Americans can empathize with someone trying to do that. But when you’re in the Oval Office and you turn on the TV and see Greece going up in flames, the inevitable result of a country living beyond its means, and you decide that’s going to continue to be your economic role model, the best that can be said about you is that you’re stubborn, ignorant and irresponsible.

Normally that would be bad enough to warrant your eviction from the White House. However, when you decide that the best way to go about getting re-elected is by pitting Americans against each other on the basis of race, class and religion, cynically turning this noble nation into a banana republic, you go from being just another Chicago hack with a leftwing agenda to joining the putrid ranks of demagogues and dictators.

©2012 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com!
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