Monday, November 25, 2013


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by Burt Prelutsky

As many of you know, I spent a good part of 2012 trying to get the Mitt Romney campaign to give me a shot at writing, co-writing or re-writing his speeches. Alas, I never managed to scale the castle wall. So it wasn’t my fault that the only things he said that anyone ever remembered were that 47% of the people would never vote for him and that 20 million illegal immigrants should self-deport.

Over the past 12 or 13 years, I have written over 1,300 articles and six books from a conservative perspective, but every time I turn around, it’s Ann Coulter or George Will or some shmoe from the NY Times who is being quoted on talk radio or over at Fox News.

Charles Krauthammer writes a book that is basically old columns with a smidgen of autobiography mixed in, and it immediately goes to number one at Amazon. However, my last book, “67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die” includes an interview with Krauthammer in which he discusses his own story at length. But in addition, I got him to talk about the book that has had the greatest influence on him; his favorite movies; his favorite columnists; the eight people, living or dead, he would invite to a dinner party and the role that religion plays in his life.

What’s more, the book also includes equally fascinating interviews with the likes of Rick Santorum, Gary Sinise, Phyllis Shlafly, Hugh Hewitt, Newt Gingrich, Walter Williams, Rick Perry, Andrew Breitbart, David Limbaugh, Pat Boone, Ralph Peters, Paul Ryan, Pat Robertson, Bernard Goldberg, Michele Bachmann, Pat Sajak, Mike Gallagher, Joe Wambaugh, myself and 47 others. Still, after a year, and even after it became available on Kindle, fewer than 500 copies have been bought.

Why am I complaining? Well, for one thing, I can use the money. But for another, the Republican Party needs as much help as it can get, just as Mitt Romney did. And the help it gets shouldn’t be totally dependent on who gets to show up on Fox and whom Rush Limbaugh deigns to mention.

There is a war on in the United States, and I feel like one of those guys during WWII who couldn’t enlist because he had flat feet. Only I don’t have flat feet. And just as there were those left on the sidelines who wanted more than anything to kill Nazis, I want the largest possible podium from which to ridicule Obama and his Marxist toadies. I want to make the whole bunch of them the laughingstocks they deserve to be.

Speaking of which, some dopes have actually tried to put a good face on the fact that Obama hasn’t fired Kathleen Sebelius. They want to pretend it’s because he has so much loyalty to his friends and colleagues. They insist that’s the same reason he didn’t fire Eric Holder over Operation Fast & Furious or any of Hillary Clinton’s State Department flunkies who had anything to do with the massacre at Benghazi.

It isn’t loyalty with Obama. It’s the psychological failing of a narcissist who simply can’t bring himself to acknowledge he made a mistake in the first place, giving authority to people even less competent than himself.

What makes liberals so despicable isn’t simply that they’re wrong on all the major issues; it’s that they are such insufferable hypocrites. For instance, they will always voice their support for higher taxes. But only, you may have noticed, for other people. Why do you think so many movies are shot outside California, either in Canada or southern right-to-work states? Verisimilitude? Not likely, unless you’re one of those people who believe that Toronto looks more like Philadelphia and New York City than Philadelphia and New York City do. The movies leave California for the same rational reason other businesses do: exorbitant taxes!

Finally, it is the height of irony that thanks to all the smart electronic gizmos on the market , never have so many dunderheads had the opportunity to let the entire world know how stupid they are, 140 characters at a time.

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments?

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