Wednesday, February 27, 2013

AH, SWEET MYSTERIES OF LIFE

I have been approached to host an internet talk radio show. The only hang-up is that it requires a certain level of sponsorship in order to get started.

If you own a company, sell a product or provide a service, or if you know someone -- preferably someone dedicated to conservatism -- who owns a company, sells a product or provides a service, who would be willing to consider sponsoring my show, please contact me at BurtPrelutsky@aol.com, and I will be happy to answer any and all questions.


In the meantime, you will all be alerted once I get airborne.

Best of all, if the show does well, I will be able to quit dunning you folks for donations to the Fund to Keep Burt Prelutsky From Pursuing a Life of Crime!

by Burt Prelutsky

With all the questions swirling around in my brain, it’s a wonder I can ever fall asleep. Some nights, the only solution is for me to count Senate Democrats jumping over a fence.

For instance, liberals regard themselves as the salt of the earth and view conservatives as a bunch of cold-hearted rotters. And, yet, research has shown that not only do conservatives donate far more to the needy, but they do it out of the goodness of their hearts. On the other hand, it always seems as if the only way that liberals can be persuaded to cough up anything for charity is through the purchase of concert tickets. Remove Bono, Bruce Springsteen and Elton John, from the mix and liberals would forget that Africa even exists.

Liberals insist that no nation is better than any other nation and no culture is superior to any other. In both cases, they have America in mind. They even go so far as to state that rock, rap and hip hop, isn’t inferior to the music created by Beethoven, Bach, Copland, Prokofiev, Gershwin, Debussy, Porter and Kern. The clodhoppers insist that if the kids like it, that’s really all that counts. It seems to me that if the only standard that matters is if the lowest common denominator likes something, a strong case could be made for cannibalism. After all, if it all comes down to personal taste, who’s to say that those who prefer chicken and fish or fruits and vegetables are any higher up the food chain than those who hanker after parboiled people?

Speaking of food, I recently came across a list of last dinners requested by serial killers on Death Row. I found it interesting. Timothy McVeigh opted for two pints of mint chocolate chip ice cream. Ricky Ray Rector ordered steak-fried chicken, a glass of cherry Kool-Aid and a slice of pecan pie. In the end, he passed on the pie, with the cryptic comment that he was saving it for later. Victor Fequer, who must have taken a leaf from Cyrano de Bergerac, ordered a single olive, but insisted it be served on a ceramic dish. John Wayne Gacy, who had been a KFC manager, ordered a bucket of original recipe chicken, along with a dozen fried shrimp and a side of French fries. Apparently he hadn’t heard that fried food will kill you.

You can’t imagine how many attachments, links and videos, well-meaning, but seriously misguided, people send me every day. Al Gore always claimed he invented the Internet, but I have to believe that God invented the Delete key, and God knows I’ve been thanking Him ever since.

Come to think of it, one reason that I tend not to join groups is because too many people are enamored of their own voice, and they don’t come with a Mute button. When I was on the Board of the Writers Guild, sometimes as many as 12 or 13 of the 16 members would let the president know they wished to address a certain issue. Two hours later, the motion would be called and the final vote would be 16-0, which is exactly what it would have been if nobody had uttered a word. I doubt if I’m the only person who is convinced it works the same way in the House and Senate.

Socrates allegedly said to one of his young disciples, “By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.”

To which, I suspect his wife, Xanthippe, replied, “The trouble with being married to a philosopher is when you tell him to hang up his toga, and not leave it on the floor, he says, “Hush, woman! Can’t you see I’m philosophizing?”

One of the great mysteries of modern life is how it is I keep hearing that there are 11 million illegal aliens in America today, which is exactly the same number that was being tossed around a dozen years ago. Are we expected to believe that none of them gave birth and that, moreover, in spite of there not being a fence at our southern border, Mexicans anticipated there would be an economic collapse seven years before it actually happened and simply stopped sneaking in?

Speaking of our terminal financial condition, one has to pity Obama when you realize that as bad as the economy he inherited in 2009 may have been, the one he inherited in 2013 was even worse.

Whenever I hear the Republican mucky-mucks talking about re-branding the GOP, I’m reminded that re-branding is what cattle rustlers used to do, adding an extra squiggle or two here, turning an “S” into an “8” there. I’m also reminded that someone once pointed out that if you don’t stand for something, you’ll likely fall for anything.

One mystery that continues to elude me is how it is that in spite of satellite surveillance, we never seem to be able to find and destroy all those terrorist training camps we keep hearing about. And how it is that thousands of those Islamic freaks can make the trek from Libya to Mali, not only more safely, but more quickly, than I can get across the San Fernando Valley? Are they cleverly disguised as sand fleas? Or, perhaps, even more cleverly, as sand?

Finally, I recently heard that Obama intends to visit Israel for the first time since moving into the White House. That’s what happens when the Jewish vote for the Democrat in a presidential election falls below 70%.

And believe me, if it had dipped below 69%, I’m sure he was prepared to undergo a circumcision.
©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article:
Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews:
67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15. Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

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Monday, February 25, 2013

MAJOR & MINOR ANNOYANCES

I have been approached to host an internet talk radio show. The only hang-up is that it requires a certain level of sponsorship in order to get started.

If you own a company, sell a product or provide a service, or if you know someone -- preferably someone dedicated to conservatism -- who owns a company, sells a product or provides a service, who would be willing to consider sponsoring my show, please contact me at BurtPrelutsky@aol.com, and I will be happy to answer any and all questions.


In the meantime, you will all be alerted once I get airborne.

Best of all, if the show does well, I will be able to quit dunning you folks for donations to the Fund to Keep Burt Prelutsky From Pursuing a Life of Crime!

by Burt Prelutsky

The macro problems with most movies today is that they are way too long, the acting isn’t very good, the scripts are worse, and the target audience seems to be teenage boys.

The micro problems are, one, that directors seem to think they are being artful when they under-light scenes when all they’re doing is turning movies into radio shows, and, two, that far too many movies don’t believe in opening credits. It makes a certain amount of sense when TV shows open on action because they want to grab the viewer before he has a chance to start channel surfing. But with movies, the sucker has already paid for his ticket, and is not about to switch over to The Bachelor or some dumb talk show featuring Katie Couric or Joy Behar.

Speaking of TV, I’m surprised that nobody has followed in the footsteps of the legendary Art Linkletter and come up with a modern day version of Kids Say the Darndest Things. Just the other day, I heard a segment on some weekend radio program where they reported on some little kids replying to questions about the tooth fairy. One four-year-old was asked what he thought the tooth fairy did with all those teeth it collected. After thinking about it, the child guessed it built a house. When he was then asked why anyone would build a house out of teeth, he said, “Because people don’t have teeth made out of bricks.”

That is so much wiser, funnier and more logical, than anything that Bill Maher, Barbara Walters or Chris Matthews, has ever said, it’s obvious that the wrong people have TV talk shows.

When the Republicans said that if the Senate doesn’t come up with a budget -- as it is legally obliged to do, but hasn’t done in four years -- senators should stop being paid until they shape up, I had to laugh. For one thing, every senator is rich. The idea that if they don’t get a check every two weeks, they’ll have trouble paying their mortgage or putting food on the table, is ridiculous. Frankly, I’m not even terribly alarmed about Washington politicians accepting pay-offs. I figure there’s as much money on one side as the other. If a member of Congress doesn’t choose to take a bribe -- I mean a campaign contribution -- from, say, the Sierra Club, he can always go, hat in hand, to some major developer or even to some sane human being who is more concerned with people than with insects.

In short, I tend to worry more about power-grabbers posing as public servants than with money-grubbers.

In the ongoing debate over guns in which the mushy-headed liberals insist that the Second Amendment has outlived its shelf life, and that we should all put our childlike faith in the police to protect us, it should be noted that quite recently, the Superintendent of the Chicago Police Department bragged that his officers respond to 70% of all 911 calls. He said that in most cities, the average is in the 30-50% range.

What’s more, he admitted that he had been burgled at least three or four times. What I found remarkable about that statement is that he had apparently lost count. It’s like someone saying, “I’ve been married three or four times” or “I’ve undergone heart surgery three or four times.” But whether it was three or four or a hundred times, I’m willing to wager that the Chicago cops responded to 100% of his 911 calls.

Here in L.A., I’m in the habit of listening to radio talk show host Dennis Prager. One of his favorite questions over the years is if a caller could only save one from drowning, whether he would rescue his dog or a stranger. Although Prager describes himself as a dog lover, he is convinced that it is the person who should be saved. He explains that, as a religious Jew, his decision is based on his belief that the stranger, being a human being, is born in God’s image.

Perhaps because I’m not religious, I don’t see things his way. I believe that although it would break my heart to let Angel die, I would always choose to save a child. However, Prager never mentions if the stranger happens to be Hitler. Okay, he’s dead. But would I look at a crack addict or a tattooed biker Nazi or a gangbanger, and say, “Well, he or she is made in God’s image, so I will let Angel, whom I love and for whom I am singularly responsible, die”? I would not. So far as I’m concerned, she is far closer to my idea of God’s image than some brain-dead junkie or some white supremacist.

Finally, I am sad to hear that the Boy Scouts of America is considering changing its policy banning homosexual scout masters. I understand that the majority of gays are not pedophiles or pederasts, but I also know that if a young boy or teenager is going to be violated on an overnighter in the woods, it is far less likely to be done by a heterosexual. I also know that none of those campaigning for an open door policy for gays are about to cough up the money to reimburse the Boy Scouts when the inevitable lawsuit occurs.

If homosexuals are so anxious to teach survival skills to youngsters, there’s nothing to stop them from forming the Gay Scouts of America, and absolutely no reason to force a group that’s been around for over a century to accommodate them.

The only reason that the Scouts are even considering violating their policy is because of money. It seems that several sponsoring groups have been threatened with boycotts unless they stop supporting Scout activities. But there’s no reason that those who profess to support traditional values can’t push back with similar threats of their own. I guarantee there are more of you than there are of them. They’re just not as apathetic.

Of one thing I’m certain. If gay activists win this battle, the Scout motto, “Be Prepared,” will take on a whole new meaning.

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article:
Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews:
67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15. Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

BurtPrelutsky.com

Friday, February 22, 2013

HOLLYWOOD MYSTERIES

I have been approached to host an internet talk radio show. The only hang-up is that it requires a certain level of sponsorship in order to get started.

If you own a company, sell a product or provide a service, or if you know someone -- preferably someone dedicated to conservatism -- who owns a company, sells a product or provides a service, who would be willing to consider sponsoring my show, please contact me at BurtPrelutsky@aol.com, and I will be happy to answer any and all questions.

In the meantime, you will all be alerted once I get airborne.

Best of all, if the show does well, I will be able to quit dunning you folks for donations to the Fund to Keep Burt Prelutsky From Pursuing a Life of Crime!

by Burt Prelutsky

I used to review movies, first for the Daily Bruin when I was attending UCLA, and then for Los Angeles magazine. Even I’m amazed that I could stand to do it for 12 years when, at the end of each year, I was hard-pressed to come up with a list of the 10 Best. To be perfectly frank, my list usually had three or four pretty good ones, another few that were okay, and two or three that were, at most, preferable to undergoing a prostate exam.

Still and all, I will state that I had a far easier task than those who have to sit through movies these days and file reports on the experience. For one thing, people like Billy Wilder, William Wyler, John Huston and Alfred Hitchcock, were still making movies back then. Today, you’ve got James Cameron, Wes Anderson, Tim Burton and Kathryn Bigelow, and Hollywood is actually handing out Oscars to the likes of The Hurt Locker, Forrest Gump, Crash, The English Patient, No Country for Old Men and Titanic.

Another problem with the movies is that apparently inside every funny man is a heartthrob yearning to get out. So it was that Burt Reynolds tried to be Clark Gable, Eddie Murphy decided to quit trying for laughs in his attempt to be Billy Dee Williams, and Ben Stiller, for some really odd reason, apparently had his heart set on being some cadaver-like, hollow-cheeked, fellow. Perhaps a Jewish Richard Widmark. It may have helped these guys get girls, but it only served to remind people how much better the originals were.

Nobody knows better than I that when it comes to movies, only our taste in food and drink tends to be nearly as subjective. For instance, I have no favorites when it comes to war movies. I simply don’t care for them. It’s not that I object to violence in movies, either, because two of my all-time favorite films are Godfather and The Untouchables.

Another genre that rarely holds any appeal for me is westerns. But at least I have enjoyed some of them, although it pains me to confess that none of them were directed by John Ford. The seven I have liked are Destry Rides Again, The Westerner, Red River, High Noon, Shane, Support Your Local Sheriff and Quigley Down Under. I just noticed that although John Wayne only appeared in one of them and Gary Cooper in two, Walter Brennan had feature roles in three of the seven.

This brings us to the last movie I saw, the highly acclaimed Argo. The film deals with the rescue of the six American foreign service employees who evaded capture by the Ayatollah Khomeini’s thugs in Iran, back in 1979, by hiding out in the home of Canada’s ambassador.

It seems that the State Department considered getting them out by smuggling in bicycles and then having them pedal their way to safety through angry mobs to Iraq, a mere 300 miles away. That made about as much sense as donning Dorothy’s ruby red slippers and clicking their heels, while repeating “There’s no place like home.”

The plan the CIA finally put in place didn’t seem a great deal more plausible. It consisted of pretending to scout Iran as the site for a Canadian sci-fi movie called Argo, and smuggling out the six hostages, passing them off as members of the film crew.

The problem for me is that the movie started out pretty funny, thanks to John Goodman and Alan Arkin as the producers of Argo, and it had a pretty exciting conclusion. But in between, the movie was all filler, killing time until the final escape mainly by showing the hostages griping about having to remain indoors and their CIA rescuer, portrayed by the film’s actual director, Ben Affleck, boozing a lot and looking worried. The middle hour of the movie is so boring, it will put your teeth to sleep.

Frankly, I don’t know why anyone sets out to make suspenseful movies based on actual events. I mean, really, how suspenseful can any movie be when you know how everything turns out ahead of time. I would say that Apollo 13 made a pretty good stab at it. But I never understood why the novel Day of the Jackal was so successful or why it led to not one, but two movie versions. Did anyone actually think the Jackal was going to assassinate Charles De Gaulle? Well, maybe Democrats did. For one thing, they don’t know their history. For another, they’ll believe just about anything.

Another thing that annoyed me about Argo is that prior to the closing credits, there was writing on the screen that brought you up to date on some of the characters. One of the things mentioned was that the following year, on January 20, 1980, the remaining hostages were released by Iran after 444 days in captivity.

What it failed to point out was that it was the very day that Jimmy Carter left the White House and Ronald Reagan took up residence. Anybody who believes that was a mere coincidence no doubt believes that Barack Obama is just the guy to stop Iran from getting its dirty mitts on a nuclear bomb.

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? Write BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article: Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

Read Burt’s latest collection of interviews:

67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15.

Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

BurtPrelutsky.com

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

THE OSCARS & OTHER TRAVESTIES

I have been approached to host an internet talk radio show. The only hang-up is that it requires a certain level of sponsorship in order to get started.

If you own a company, sell a product or provide a service, or if you know someone -- preferably someone dedicated to conservatism -- who owns a company, sells a product or provides a service, who would be willing to consider sponsoring my show, please contact me at BurtPrelutsky@aol.com, and I will be happy to answer any and all questions.


In the meantime, you will all be alerted once I get airborne.

Best of all, if the show does well, I will be able to quit dunning you folks for donations to the Fund to Keep Burt Prelutsky From Pursuing a Life of Crime!

by Burt Prelutsky

It is once again that time of year when we are told that a billion people around the world will be tuned in to see which of the over-hyped movies and actors get to take home Academy Awards. My wife will be tuned in because she likes to see what everyone is wearing and I’ll be watching because I enjoy seeing the winners trying to act humble and I get a kick out of watching the losers pretend to be good sports.

The fact of the matter is that as with most elections, the winners have to spend a king’s ransom advertising. For months, the same people who will go on stage and pretend they are unworthy have been waging war in the Hollywood trade papers.

This year, there’s been a lot of static over the fact that Kathryn Bigelow, who directed Zero Dark Thirty, wasn’t nominated for an Academy Award, even though the movie was. As a result, as happens whenever a woman appears to have been slighted, we have been hearing from the usual suspects that sexism reigns in Hollywood.

The dopes ignore a few salient points. For one thing, although they are now nominating 10 movies for Best Picture, they continue to only nominate five directors. Therefore, if one were to say that if it was an injustice in her case, it was equally so for Ben Affleck, whose Argo was nominated, while he wasn’t. For another thing, how is it that if the Academy is now riddled with sexists, it wasn’t two short years ago when they actually gave Bigelow the Oscar for the mediocre Hurt Locker. Is it possible that the Academy been over-run with right-wingers? And if so, why wasn’t I invited to join the coup?

We had the same scenario when Barbra Streisand wasn’t nominated as Best Director for The Prince of Tides, and outraged feminists –there being no other kind! - ignored the fact that she had been given an Oscar for the very forgettable song, “Evergreen.”

Back in 1958, David Niven won the Best Actor Oscar, Wendy Hiller won as Best Supporting Actress and Deborah Kerr was nominated as Best Actress. What’s more, the movie they all appeared in, Separate Tables, was nominated as one of the five Best Pictures. In spite of all that, its director, my friend, Delbert Mann, was not nominated. To his credit, he didn’t whine about it. He was disappointed, but he didn’t complain that the Academy members had it in for guys born in Kansas.

It seems to be a constant complaint that when women don’t win any award they might have a shot at, it’s because of blatant sexism. And when they do win, it’s based on recognition of their sheer genius, even when there might be more women than men casting ballots on both occasions.

It reminds me of the black college basketball coach who, after several losing seasons, was let go a few years back, and accused the university of racism, ignoring the obvious fact that it was the very same institution that had hired him in the first place.

Only the folks who hand out the Nobel Peace Prize make as many bad decisions as the members of the Motion Picture Academy. These are the folks, let us never forget, who decided that “Sweet Leilani” was a better song than “They Can’t Take That Away From Me” and that “Three Coins in the Fountain” was better than “The Man That Got Away.”

They gave Oscars to the likes of The Greatest Show on Earth, The English Patient, The Deer Hunter, Driving Miss Daisy and Platoon, but never even nominated Roxanne, My Cousin Vinny, Hail the Conquering Hero, Singin’ in the Rain or Groundhog Day.

These are the very same goofballs who have given not one, but two Oscars, to Sean Penn, Tom Hanks and Jane Fonda, but none to Irene Dunne, Jean Arthur, Claude Rains, William Powell, Montgomery Clift, Thelma Ritter or Preston Sturges, and never even got around to nominating Joseph Cotton, Steve Martin or Edward G. Robinson.

This year, the biggest blemish on the Oscars had nothing to do with Kathryn Bigelow. It’s the fact that they, who saw fit to bestow Oscars on Michael Moore and Al Gore, for such left-wing crapola as Bowling for Columbine and An Inconvenient Truth, respectively, never even had 2016 on their short list of 15 documentaries worthy of consideration.

One thing for certain is that on Oscar night, when one recipient after another rushes on stage, and with the sort of cloying humility that made Charles Dickens’ Uriah Heep so singularly obnoxious, insists that they are undeserving of such an honor, I’ll be sitting home, echoing their sentiments.
©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article:
Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews:
67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15. Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

BurtPrelutsky.com

Monday, February 18, 2013

PURSUING THE NEWS

I have been approached to host an internet talk radio show. The only hang-up is that it requires a certain level of sponsorship in order to get started.

If you own a company, sell a product or provide a service, or if you know someone -- preferably someone dedicated to conservatism -- who owns a company, sells a product or provides a service, who would be willing to consider sponsoring my show, please contact me at BurtPrelutsky@aol.com, and I will be happy to answer any and all questions.


In the meantime, you will all be alerted once I get airborne.

Best of all, if the show does well, I will be able to quit dunning you folks for donations to the Fund to Keep Burt Prelutsky From Pursuing a Life of Crime!

by Burt Prelutsky

Even when you write as often as I do, you can’t really keep up with all the zaniness that passes for the news today. But I can’t help trying.

For instance, there were only three senators who voted against confirming John Kerry, who not only lied about his service and his injuries in Vietnam, but then lied about throwing away his medals. He not only kept his medals, but had them framed on the wall of his Senate office. It was other people’s medals he tossed for the benefit of the cameras. In any case, I thought it was worth looking into, and I discovered that the three senators who had the courage of their convictions, and deserved to be lauded, were John Cornyn, James Inhofe and Ted Cruz.

Speaking of the members of the U.S. Senate, most of whom are ex-lawyers, I heard some wag recently suggest that it’s 98% of lawyers who give the other 2% a bad name.

Let me first state so that there is no confusion, I respect the members of the military. After all, the main order of business for the federal government is not, as liberals insist, funding green energy companies, handing out free stuff in exchange for votes or promoting abortions and same-sex marriages. Instead, it is to protect the nation, and it’s the military that handles that end of things. That being said, I do not believe it provides veterans with a lifetime pass from criticism. I actually heard a senator state that Chuck Hagel should not have had to face such tough questions at his confirmation hearing because he had not only served in the military, but had been wounded in combat.

Just because people have served – some more honorably than others—is no guarantee that they will be anything special once they return to civilian life. After all, Charley Rangel, John Murtha, Colin Powell, David Petraeus, John McCain, Daniel Inouye and Ted Kennedy, along with Chuck Hagel, have not only been shown to have feet of clay, but in some cases have shown themselves to be covered in muck all the way to the top of their heads.

Proof that liberals aren’t really concerned with gun violence is that they keep yammering about the size of magazines, but have said nothing about taking on the urban gangs responsible for most of the murders in America. Their hypocrisy is even more apparent when you realize that every city whose streets are bloody because of the hands-off approach politicians take with these punks is saddled with a liberal mayor.

It’s apparent that when the same people who wish to disarm law-abiding Americans turn a blind eye to the black and Hispanic gangs that terrorize their communities, they adopt a hands-off approach to guns only when they regard them as tools of the criminal trade.

In the aftermath of Chris Kyle, the former Navy Seal super sniper, and his friend, being murdered at a Texas shooting range, Dan Parker wrote to say he assumed that, henceforth, the Democrats would designate shooting ranges as gun-free zones. And I say, “Why wouldn’t they?” After all, they had already designated an Army base, Fort Hood, a gun-free-zone, thus making it available to Major Hasan for target practice.

The funniest thing to come out of the gun debate was the photo of Barack Obama allegedly skeet-shooting at Camp David. Even I, who haven’t fired a rifle since my days in the ROTC, know that you don’t hold a rifle that high up on your shoulder and you certainly don’t aim it straight-on when skeet-shooting, as if your target were Rush Limbaugh or Sean Hannity. Skeets, as we all know, are airborne. Firing at the angle shown in the photo, the only thing Obama would have hit was the poor schmuck working the skeet release. You would think that Team Obama would do a better job of it even if they were merely photo-shopping the picture in order to show that Obama’s trumped-up war on guns was nothing personal.

As you may have heard, it has been announced that the FBI is looking into allegations that Sen. Robert Menendez has been accused of engaging in sexual activity with under-age Dominican prostitutes. He denies it, insisting it’s a tissue of lies concocted by a cabal of right-wingers.

As Americans, we are supposed to believe he’s innocent until proven guilty. And I’m sure that those who park their commonsense at the curb will give him the benefit of the doubt. But not I. For one thing, why else would anyone go there as often as he has, except to do nasty things he can’t get away with closer to home? For another, when is the last time there’s been a rumor about a politician engaged in unsavory sexual activity that hasn’t been proven true?

Just a partial list – a very partial list limited to those you’ve probably heard of – includes Anthony Weiner, David Wu, Eric Massa, David Petraeus, John Ensign, John Edwards, Ted and Jack Kennedy, Chris Dodd, Newt Gingrich, Larry Craig, Mark Foley, Gary Condit, Strom Thurmond, Mel Reynolds, Henry Hyde, Gary Hart, Wayne Hayes, Jesse Jackson, Wilbur Mills, FDR, Warren G. Harding and even Alexander Hamilton.

For good measure, there was President James Buchanan and his V.P., William Rufus King, whom Andrew Jackson, not the most politically correct man in the world, jokingly referred to as Miss Nancy and Aunt Fancy.

Finally, if there has ever been a person in our lifetime who best exemplified what it means to be a devout liberal, it is probably Jane Fonda, whose actual birth name was Lady Jane Seymour Fonda. Not only did she go out of her way to lend aid and comfort to our enemy in Vietnam -- (“Hanoi Jane,” you must agree, is a lot catchier than Lady Jane Seymour Fonda) -- , but her personal hypocrisy is of Olympian proportions.

Just recently, I discovered that she was the third choice to star in “The Exorcist.” The first, Audrey Hepburn, agreed to play the role that eventually went to Ellen Burstyn, but only if it were shot in Italy, where she was then living. Next was Anne Bancroft, who turned down the role only because she had just discovered she was pregnant.

It was at that point, after two of the best actresses in the world had passed with regrets, that it was offered to Fonda. She turned it down by phoning the head of Warner Brothers and demanding to know why he would want to make” a piece of capitalist rip-off bullshit like this.”

To grasp the full, self-aggrandizing, impact of that statement, you have to keep in mind that this self-anointed moral arbiter had already starred in “Barbarella,” the execrable sex fantasy directed by her first husband, Roger Vadim, and would soon go on to make millions of dollars with a series of silly exercise DVDs that she peddled with the sort of single-mindedness usually reserved to used car salesmen, televangelists and Bill O’Reilly.

It wasn’t until some years later that she hit the trifecta of liberal hypocrisy when she tied the knot with billionaire goofball capitalist Ted Turner.

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

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North Hills, CA 91343-3604

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Friday, February 15, 2013

MY PERSONAL BEEF WITH THE GOP

I have been approached to host an internet talk radio show. The only hang-up is that it requires a certain level of sponsorship in order to get started.

If you own a company, sell a product or provide a service, or if you know someone -- preferably someone dedicated to conservatism -- who owns a company, sells a product or provides a service, who would be willing to consider sponsoring my show, please contact me at BurtPrelutsky@aol.com, and I will be happy to answer any and all questions.


In the meantime, you will all be alerted once I get airborne.

Best of all, if the show does well, I will be able to quit dunning you folks for donations to the Fund to Keep Burt Prelutsky From Pursuing a Life of Crime!

by Burt Prelutsky

Although I have devoted most of the 1,200 articles I’ve written over the past decade to deriding Democrats, I wouldn’t want anyone to get the idea that I don’t have my share of problems with Republicans.
I’m not merely referring to the lack of guts they so often display in Congress or the way they let things slide from 2001-2007 when they controlled everything in Washington, D.C., and instead of pushing forward a conservative agenda, spent most of their time trying to cozy up to the likes of Ted Kennedy and proving they could waste our tax dollars nearly as well as liberals.

Speaking of money, on this one occasion, I won’t spend a lot of time chastising wealthy conservatives for blowing their loot trying to promote some mediocrity in the primaries when they should be buying up newspapers and TV stations. It seems pretty obvious that we can’t rely entirely on blogs and talk radio to get our message out.

Instead, I will take this opportunity to complain about my lot as a conservative writer.

To begin with, I have never been able to get any of my articles published or even re-printed in such places as the Wall Street Journal, USA Today, the NY Post, the Weekly Standard, the National Review or Townhall magazine. What’s more, Townhall has consistently refused to review any of my half dozen books. Adding insult to insult, the Heritage Foundation has never invited me to use its bully pulpit.

As for my books, I have never been able to persuade Regnery or any of the handful of conservative houses to publish even one of them. I did finally receive a commendation from an editor, but the message was that I wasn’t well-known enough for them to consider. In other words, because I neither hosted my own TV or radio show, nor appeared regularly on other people’s, they would have to expend some effort to publicize anything I wrote, so why bother?

To be fair, the brilliant and noble Bernard Goldberg has written the forewords to a couple of my books, but the publishers would only have been interested if he’d written the books and I’d written the forewords.

On the other hand, because the major houses don’t publish my books, Fox has never invited me to be a guest. It’s my own hellish version of Catch 22.

But inasmuch as Fox has left-wingers like Juan Williams, Geraldo Rivera, Bob Beckel, Leslie Marshall, Alan Colmes and, now, Dennis Kucinich, cluttering up their shows, they don’t really have much room left for another conservative.

As some of you know, I devoted months last year to trying to connect with the Romney campaign. I even resorted to sending one of my books to one of Romney’s sons, Matt, in my attempt to be considered for his writing staff. I never heard back from anyone. Now I’m not saying I could have actually helped Romney get elected, but I guarantee he wouldn’t have finished any worse than second.

Another area of frustration is that even though I have interviewed such conservative radio talk show hosts as Dennis Prager, Hugh Hewitt, Mike Gallagher, Joyce Kaufman and Michael Medved, for my books, only Medved has ever invited me on his show.


What’s worse, from my point of view, is that when I have approached the likes of Rush Limbaugh, Mark Levin, Sean Hannity, Bill O’Reilly, Laura Ingraham, Steve Hayes, Jim DeMint, Bill Kristol, Ann Coulter, Fred Barnes, Dennis Miller, the Koch brothers, Jan Brewer, Glenn Beck, Mark Steyn, Michelle Malkin, Donald Trump, Ed Feulner, Nikki Haley, Allen West, Reince Priebus, Sarah Palin, and more senators and House members than I have room to mention, requesting an interview, I’ve been royally snubbed. Not even the courtesy of a “thanks for thinking of me” response. You’d have thought I was asking to borrow money.

And although over the years, I have managed to snag the likes of Rick Santorum, Paul Ryan, Michele Bachmann, Rick Perry, Newt Gingrich, John Bolton and Gerald Ford, I have never received a single bit of feedback from any GOP luminary. On the other hand, I have received brickbats in the form of angry emails from the staffs of Charles Rangel, the late Sen. Daniel Inouye, and personally from Henry Waxman. So I know there are folks in Washington, D.C., who seem to be hanging on my every word. They just don’t happen to be Republicans.

I don’t expect this will change anything, but I appreciate your letting me vent. I feel a lot better.

Next time, I promise to get back to attacking Obama and his enablers. At least I know they’re paying attention. And, yes, I do expect to be audited by the IRS.
©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article:
Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

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67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

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For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

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Wednesday, February 13, 2013

BARACK & HILLARY, SITTING IN A TREE…

I have been approached to host an internet talk radio show. The only hang-up is that it requires a certain level of sponsorship in order to get started.

If you own a company, sell a product or provide a service, or if you know someone -- preferably someone dedicated to conservatism -- who owns a company, sells a product or provides a service, who would be willing to consider sponsoring my show, please contact me at BurtPrelutsky@aol.com, and I will be happy to answer any and all questions.


In the meantime, you will all be alerted once I get airborne.

Best of all, if the show does well, I will be able to quit dunning you folks for donations to the Fund to Keep Burt Prelutsky From Pursuing a Life of Crime!

by Burt Prelutsky

There must be something in the air near the Potomac that rots the brains of just about everyone who ventures into our nation’s capital. The latest example was Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta insisting that having women fighting in the frontlines would just about ensure that we’d never lose a future war.

Inasmuch as one in four women who were deployed to Iraq and Afghanistan claimed they were sexually assaulted, my own suggestion is that the only men with whom women in the armed services should affiliate are gays.

The propaganda would have it that women only want to have the opportunity to compete for the opportunity to serve in the infantry and armor units. People like Mr. Panetta insist that they oppose lowering military standards. To which, I say, with all due disrespect: phooey!

Just as soon as the social engineers notice that very few women are cutting it, those physical requirements will be dramatically reduced. Here in L.A., I’ll point out that we used to have physical standards for the L.A.P.D. But once the move was on to start recruiting women and Latinos, the strength and height requirements were quickly adjusted to accommodate weaker women and shorter men.

Even my wife, who even in these politically correct times happens to be a woman, agrees with me. To my argument, she adds that those people who refuse to recognize gender differences even go so far as to ignore menstruation. She points out that these monthly events involve pain and blood and would radically detract from the women’s ability to concentrate on the matter at hand on a battlefield.

One of the leaders in the campaign to stick women in the infantry is a retired Air Force officer, Colonel Martha McSally. In a debate I saw on Fox, when a retired general, Jerry Boykin, pointed out that flying missions and then returning to women’s barracks does not involve the same sort of gender-mingling as being on the ground in a war zone, Col. McSally typically ignored his logic and instead, sounding exactly like a liberal lunkhead, insisted on fairness and gender equality.

Although she nattered on about patriotism, sound judgment and courage, by fairness, what she meant was that military promotions are more easily obtained through combat missions. In this particular battle of the sexes, Gen. Boykin emerged victorious as soon as he concluded his remarks by stating that the job of the military is to win wars, not to worry about career opportunities for women.

Speaking of women, her adoring acolytes are already promoting Hillary Clinton for a presidential run in 2016. We are being told over and over again what a great job she’s done as secretary of state, although nobody has yet been able to come up with a single accomplishment, unless they’re referring to the neat way she managed to accept responsibility for the massacre in Benghazi without taking even the tiniest sliver of blame.

One fact that has gotten a lot of attention is that Mrs. Clinton visited 112 countries during her four years on the job. But I fail to see how that adds up to anything. It’s not as if she even has to do her own packing or rushing to catch a plane. To me, it means she found an easy way to keep her name and face in front of the public while managing to avoid Bill for weeks at a time.

For several years, one of the ugliest images I have had in my head has been of that last U.S. helicopter taking off and leaving our South Vietnamese allies stranded on a rooftop, knowing they would be tortured and murdered by the North Vietnamese. A second image has now joined that one. It’s of Hillary Clinton, in referring to the massacre in Benghazi, doing her hammy version of moral outrage and insisting that it made no difference if the four Americans were killed by terrorists or by some guys who just happened to be passing by our consulate.

How anyone could watch that slimy performance and not experience moral revulsion is beyond me. But, clearly, Steve Kroft of “60 Minutes” is the sort of person who can swallow any swill that Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama serves up and swear it tastes just like chicken.

I had given up on “60 Minutes” a long time ago, but my curiosity got the better of me and against my better instincts, I tuned in. For my troubles I got to see Mr. Kroft go from allegedly being a professional journalist to being a matchmaker.

Once I heard that it was Obama who initiated the segment, and then insisted that it only run half-an-hour, I pretty much expected what I got. Here’s a guy who can spend an hour eating an ice cream cone on Martha’s Vineyard and not give it a second thought, but suddenly his time is at a premium.

According to Kroft, he felt he could either ask the two of them some tough questions regarding the goings-on in Syria and Egypt, and delve into the Benghazi cover-up, or he could question the President and the Secretary of State about their personal relationship. After asking himself what Jimmy Kimmel or Katie Couric would do, Kroft naturally went with the second option.

What the viewers might have surmised from this eHarmony-style commercial is that they both like candlelight dinners and moonlight strolls on the beach. Unfortunately, what they were less open about is that they both subscribe to Saul Alinsky’s approach to bringing Soviet-style socialism to America.

While watching the love fest, I couldn’t help but compare it to the “60 Minutes” show in 1992 when Bill and Hillary appeared in the run-up to the election, looking like a couple of strangers seated next to each other waiting for a bus.

After watching Barack and Hillary billing-and-cooing for 30 minutes, I suspect that by the time he got home, Michelle was waiting with a rolling pin and a ton of attitude, wanting to know where he got off cozying up to that honky bitch.

For my part, I will forever regret that I wasn’t on one of those congressional committees questioning her eminence, so that in response to her phony outburst, I could have replied, “For that matter, Mrs. Clinton, what difference does it really make if Bill only cheated with Monica Lewinsky or if he’s cheated on you with a thousand women, including your mother, your best friend, every woman on your staff and the family mutt?”

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article:
Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews:
67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15. Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

BurtPrelutsky.com

Monday, February 11, 2013

PLOTTING THE FUTURE OF CALIFORNIA’S GOP

Liberals: America’s TermitesThis is just a friendly reminder that you don’t pay a dime for the dozen or so articles I post every month. In case you’re feeling guilty, this is your chance at absolution by sending cash, check or money order to

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn Street
North Hills, CA 91343-3604.

Your donation will serve as your entry in a monthly drawing to receive either an autographed copy of Barack Obama: You're Fired! or Liberals: America’s Termites. Please make your preference known when you make your donation.

Raymond Kasey of Falls Church, VA, won the January drawing.  A copy of Liberals: America's Termites is on its way to him.

by Burt Prelutsky

Last month, I was invited to be on a panel at the bi-annual convention of the California Congress of Republicans. This isn’t just a gathering of like-minded conservatives. These are political activists whose lives are built around actually trying to wage successful campaigns in a state so blue, it could be renamed East Hawaii.

In case you’re unaware, this is the place where the Democrats hold super majorities in both the state senate and the state assembly. This is the place that Dianne Feinstein, Barbara Boxer, Henry Waxman, Brad Sherman and Maxine Waters, call home. We’re the cuckoo nest that decided that the only thing better than having a young Jerry Brown as our governor was having an old Jerry Brown.

The folks who show up at these conventions are nice people, but they are so divorced from reality that they actually believe they can win elections if they simply make 10 more phone calls or knock on 10 more doors at election time. And the truth is, they can. But only if they’re outside the large urban areas on the coast, which just happens to be where most of us live.

The way I look at it, they’re not hurting anyone and everybody needs a hobby. It’s sort of like the arts and crafts classes they have at the asylum. The activities aren’t going to cure the inmates, but it keeps them occupied. So it is that while the crackpots stay busy making lanyards and pot holders, California Republicans hold conventions.

The panel consisted of five politicians and me. I figured I had them out-numbered.

In my opening statement, I said, “When I heard I’d be up here surrounded by politicians, I figured I might have to use a crow bar in order to get a word in edgewise. So I better get it all said up front.

“There may have been a few California Republicans who couldn’t make it today because of the lousy weather, but it seems to me that most of us are in this room. Hard to believe that when I was young, California was a conservative state. What’s more, the L.A. Times was a conservative newspaper.

“When I heard Dick Morris tell Bill O’Reilly a few years ago that Meg Whitman and Carly Fiorina were locks to win their elections against Jerry Brown and Barbara Boxer, I began trying to track him down. I didn’t want to set him straight, you understand; I just wanted to get a bet down.

“The fact is, I was convinced that Mitt Romney was going to defeat Barack Obama up until the time I heard Morris agreeing with me.

“The trouble in California is the trouble with America. Most voters are dumb and lazy and are either getting goodies from the liberals or hope to get them. And it certainly doesn’t help that the Left controls the message because they control the mass media. There is at least a partial solution. Instead of sinking millions of dollars into her own ill-fated campaign, Meg Whitman should have been buying up newspapers and local TV stations. Frankly, with the state senate and state assembly in the hands of left-wing super majorities, I couldn’t even imagine why she wanted to be the governor of California.

“People such as the Koch brothers and Sheldon Adelson should be doing the same thing on a national basis. I’m not suggesting they’d be able to pick up ABC, NBC and CBS, but there are plenty of other media outlets they could buy up and control, including those targeting Hispanic and Asian voters. Adelson, who wasted millions of dollars bankrolling Newt Gingrich’s ill-fated bid for the GOP nomination, owns the Sands and is worth approximately $22 billion. He does own a newspaper, by the way. Unfortunately, it’s the HaYom, in Israel.

“On a national level, the GOP is so dumb that they don’t even take advantage of the fact that the Democrats allow a couple of stiffs like Harry Reid, a man born to oversee funeral arrangements, and Nancy Pelosi, who’s had so much plastic surgery, even her dog no longer recognizes her, be the face of their party.

“But what does our side do? Instead of counterpunching by making use of such smart and personable people as Paul Ryan, Marco Rubio, Ted Cruz and John Thune, by having them front for our side, we wind up with John Boehner and Mitch McConnell. Now, behind closed doors, they may be two very savvy guys. I wouldn’t know. But in a world where image counts for a great deal, they are about as appealing as chicken pox.

“With the GOP, our motto seems to be: God forbid we ever take advantage of an advantage.

“Even when we had control of the White House and the two houses of Congress, from 2001-2007, we did almost nothing to promote a conservative agenda. Instead, we behaved like a bunch of giggly high school girls hoping that the starting quarterback, aka Ted Kennedy, would invite us to the prom.

“When it comes to strategy, it’s as if the Democrats are playing in the major leagues and the Republicans are like kids goofing around in a sandlot. That’s why the best we do when we somehow manage to win national elections, is to half-heartedly apply the brakes. Alas, that means that when the Democrats inevitably stage a comeback, they get to pick up exactly where they left off.

“I mean, we controlled the works for six long years and we never even tried to head off ObamaCare by applying a little commonsense to the problem of health care in America. Did we allow people to buy insurance across state borders? We did not. Did we initiate tort reform in order to safeguard doctors against nuisance suits brought by ambulance chasers? Of course not. I mean, why would we want to offend trial lawyers, who are probably the fourth most generous benefactors to the Democratic Party, trailing only unions, Hollywood nitwits and George Soros!

“I hate to come off as the Grim Reaper, but I’m afraid the GOP has a bleak future in California. Unfortunately, there are sizable blocs of California voters -- Hispanics, blacks, Asians, Jews, feminists, gays and college students -- who have, for a variety of mainly venal reasons, found their home in the other party. And the fact is, habits, let alone addictions, are tough to break.

“In case it escaped everyone’s notice, in the 2012 presidential election, the positive news in California was that Obama received 420,000 fewer votes than he garnered in 2008. The really depressing news is that even after the state barely survived four years of this menace in the White House, Mitt Romney received 200,000 fewer votes than John McCain!

“But, in the spirit of the occasion, I will try to end this address on a high note. The truth is that things, even here in California, are not entirely hopeless.

“For instance, if that huge earthquake we’ve been hearing about our entire lives finally hits, and manages to dump a 30 mile swath of western California in the Pacific, not only would this hotel have an ocean view, but we Republicans would never lose another election.”
©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article:
Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews:
67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15. Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

BurtPrelutsky.com

Saturday, February 9, 2013

R.I.P. LEE RODGERS, LEGENDARY BROADCASTER & FRIEND


Monday, February 4, 2013

Dear Mrs. Rodgers:

I am so sorry to hear of Lee's passing. He often had me on as a guest on his radio show and after his retirement, I would occasionally receive a thumbs-up on an article I had posted. It meant a lot to me, coming from him.

Although we never met in person, I liked him a lot. And I will miss him.

Sincerely,

Burt Prelutsky


Tuesday, February 5, 2013

Dear Mr. Prelutsky:

Lee was one of your great admirers. He often talked at lunch about how you had such a knack of expressing the political, economic and social climate in such excellent cogent terms. Many of your writings appeared in his blog over the past few years and he used your intellect to punctuate his own beliefs.

Lee was the love of my life, my best friend and my hero. I could not have had a finer individual as my partner. There is an enormous black hole he filled in my life. I would have to say that I must have done something right to deserve such a man. I just wish it were a much longer time.

Thank you so much for writing to me and for bringing him joy in your writing. He greatly admired and appreciated your work. Carry on with gusto.

All the best,

Susan Rodgers

Visit my web page at http://www.radiorodgers.com
My email address is: www.radiorodgers1@yahoo.com

Friday, February 8, 2013

WITH ALL DUE DISRESPECT…

Liberals: America’s TermitesThis is just a friendly reminder that you don’t pay a dime for the dozen or so articles I post every month. In case you’re feeling guilty, this is your chance at absolution by sending cash, check or money order to

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn Street
North Hills, CA 91343-3604.

Your donation will serve as your entry in a monthly drawing to receive either an autographed copy of Barack Obama: You're Fired! or Liberals: America’s Termites. Please make your preference known when you make your donation.

Raymond Kasey of Falls Church, VA, won the January drawing.  A copy of Liberals: America's Termites is on its way to him.

by Burt Prelutsky

If there’s one term I would like to see retired in 2013, it’s the one so much favored by politicians and other hypocrites: “With all due respect.”

Has anyone in the history of the world begun a sentence with those four words that didn’t immediately evolve into the equivalent of calling the other person a charlatan, a thief or an ignoramus?

Recently, we had Hillary Clinton open her remarks to Sen. Ron Johnson with those words just before going into her well-rehearsed rant about nobody needing to know whether Ambassador Stevens and his three colleagues were killed by members of al Qaeda or by some guys taking a nighttime stroll in Benghazi who suddenly decided to kill Americans.

If my Aunt Hilda had said something that stupid, it would only matter to her husband, my Uncle Morrie. But this is the woman who, in her mid-60s, still has her eye on the White House. It’s hard to believe that she had four months to come up with a response, and that bit of hammy stage craft was the best that the Secretary of State and the spin merchants in Obama’s White House could come up with. Heck, even I could feign moral outrage better than that.

Isn’t it odd that nobody in this Second Amendment-bashing administration ever said, “Who cares what kinds of guns were used in Newtown? Isn’t it enough that 20 little children were murdered by a loon?”

If there’s one thing you can count on from Obama and his minions, it’s that they’re always ready to take responsibility, at least so long as neither self-sacrifice nor punishment is involved. Instead, whether it’s Eric Holder or Mrs. Clinton, their defense always seems to be that they didn’t bother reading memos, whether they came from the ATF regarding weapons being delivered to Mexican gangbangers or from their ambassadors begging for their lives.

What I find the most distressing is that Mrs. Clinton, has never displayed anything special when it comes to intelligence, wisdom or personal character. In fact, aside from arrogance and naked political ambition, I can’t come up with a single human quality I could easily attribute to her. In spite of that, she has a 59% approval rating among American voters a scant four years before the next presidential election.

Inasmuch as even in the wake of his re-election, Obama’s own rating is barely 50%, it behooves Republicans to start getting the truth out about this combination of Michelle Obama, Evita Peron and a rabid weasel, and the sooner the better. And let’s not have any of that “with all due respect” malarkey; ridicule is the best weapon to use on the terminally pompous.

The only reason that these left-wing boobs get away with the stuff they do is because we have a media that views its mission to be Obama’s first line of defense. The depths to which the MSM has sunk can be seen in a recent piece written by John Dickerson. Titled “Go for the Throat,” the article advises Barack Obama to declare war on the GOP. In the course of the piece, he employed such verbs as “destroy” and “pulverize,” in spelling out exactly what Obama needs to do during his second administration if he’s going to fulfill his destiny.

Although he was merely parroting what the likes of Bill Maher, Jon Stewart, Joy Behar and David Letterman, say every day on TV, what sets Mr. Dickerson apart from those other shills is that he is the political director of CBS News, whose motto these days should be: “Delivering the News: Unfair and Unbalanced.”

At least he wasn’t guilty of hypocrisy. He didn’t pretend to be engaged in civil discourse. He leaves that swill to politicians, especially those of the Republican persuasion. Considering that we conservatives despise most of our politicians nearly as much as liberals do, you would think they might at least consider changing their tactics. When our party leaders speak respectfully to or about the likes of Harry Reid, Charles Schumer, Henry Waxman and Nancy Pelosi, it reeks of cowardice. Our side kowtows to them, and they return the favor by labeling our representatives a bunch of fascists, yahoos and racists.

When conservatives constantly insist on taking the high road, they merely invite more contempt from liberals. If any conservative in the House or Senate actually voiced an honest opinion of those blockheads on the other side of the aisle, the chances are that even Mr. Dickerson would be forced to air it on the evening news. The high road isn’t just the road less travelled, it’s a road that no liberal would ever set foot on.

For that matter, in the war over guns, why hasn’t a single Republican dared to point out that nearly all 506 of those gun-related killings that took place in Chicago last year were committed by young blacks, and they were mainly using hand guns. Even Mayor Rahm Emanuel understands that nothing Barack Obama, Joe Biden or Dianne Feinstein, has proposed would have prevented any of those murders. But there isn’t a single big city mayor -- virtually all of whom are Democrats – who would dare declare war on those who have turned “urban” into a synonym for “killing field.”

Speaking of Obama, although it got scant attention, in the course of his inaugural address, he promised “Peace in our time.” Although liberal pinheads have compared His Fatuousness to Abe Lincoln, Franklin Roosevelt and Martin Luther King, perhaps he feels a special kinship to Neville Chamberlain. After all, it was he, the umbrella-wielding prime minister who returned to London after meeting with Hitler in Munich, to announce “We will have peace in our time.” Much to his chagrin, and not too many people’s surprise, Hitler invaded Poland a few months later.

Ever since then, “peace in our time” has come to represent those who foolishly and dangerously subscribe to the belief that dictators can be trusted to abide by treaties, and that pacifism is a perfectly legitimate basis for a nation’s foreign policy.

Finally, in the wake of the inaugural, much was made of the fact that Beyonce lip-synced the National Anthem. I didn’t object, though. For one thing, I think she looks better than she sings. For another thing, even if she wasn’t performing live, that was actually her voice.

What I take exception to is the sort of lip-synching Juan Williams engages in during his all too frequent appearances on Fox News. I see his lips flapping, but all I ever hear is Barack Obama.
©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article:
Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews:
67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15. Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

BurtPrelutsky.com

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

THE BATTLE OF ATHENS

Liberals: America’s TermitesThis is just a friendly reminder that you don’t pay a dime for the dozen or so articles I post every month. In case you’re feeling guilty, this is your chance at absolution by sending cash, check or money order to

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn Street
North Hills, CA 91343-3604.

Your donation will serve as your entry in a monthly drawing to receive either an autographed copy of Barack Obama: You're Fired! or Liberals: America’s Termites. Please make your preference known when you make your donation.

Raymond Kasey of Falls Church, VA, won the January drawing.  A copy of Liberals: America's Termites is on its way to him.

by Burt Prelutsky

In 1946, there was a rebellion in McMinn County, Tennessee, that came to be known as the Battle of Athens. Frankly, I had never heard of it until recently. I guess it took the latest campaign against the Second Amendment to remind people that there was a time when Americans had to depend on their guns to ensure their rights against their fellow Americans.

It was shortly after the end of World War II. A group of rotten politicians, a crooked sheriff and his corrupt deputies, were once again trying to steal an election by confiscating the ballot boxes and reporting the tally. It had been a way of life in the city of Athens, but this time was different. This time, a bunch of returning veterans, who had just got done fighting and bleeding for liberty in Europe and Asia, decided to put a stop to it. And thanks to their guns, they did just that by storming the sheriff’s office and rescuing the votes before they could once again be miscounted..

The battle was short-lived, as they often are when the people finally get their fill of being pushed around by bullies drawing government paychecks.

I recently got around to watching The Iron Lady with Meryl Streep doing her accent shtick as Margaret Thatcher. Her performance wasn’t terrible, and thanks to makeup, they managed to make her resemble Mrs. Thatcher. What was truly disgusting about the movie is that well over half of it was spent showing the woman shuffle around her apartment, talking to her dead husband, while suffering from Alzheimer’s.

If the producers had wanted to make the case at this late date that it’s a dreadful disease that destroys the mind and memory of those afflicted, they could certainly have based it on a fictional character, as TV has done more times than I care to think about. But this should have been the story of an extraordinarily courageous and accomplished woman, with her melancholy end, at most, a minor coda at the end of her inspiring saga.

After watching the movie, it occurred to me that there’s nothing the Left enjoys so much as depicting the lives of those they detest on stage and screen. They have already demonized or at least ridiculed the likes of Nixon, Palin, Reagan, Bush and Mrs. Thatcher. Next, I hear that the devoutly liberal John Cusack is set to produce and star in a movie about Rush Limbaugh. I don’t think it’s because they look alike.

Until I heard it from Michael Medved, I had not been aware of the fact that although only about nine percent of all Americans are left-handed, every president since 1988 has been a leftie. I’m not sure what it all means, but I’d say that in Barack Obama’s case, it has not only prevented him from being even-handed, but has let it totally dictate his political agenda.

Although I’m aware that most liberals would love to see all guns banished, I’m equally aware that Democrats, especially those up for re-election in 2014, merely want to raise their voices in moral outrage. They sure don’t want to go on record by voting for such blatant nonsense. Still, it was pretty shabby of them to pretend it was a matter of life and death that law-abiding Americans identify themselves and their legally-obtained weapons, when these are the very same palookas who insist it’s an infringement of civil rights for people to obtain photo IDs in order to vote in our elections.

Just to prove that all the liberal loons are not taking up space in the Oval Office or Congress, otherwise known as the Politburo, we have proof that they are also well-represented in Pennsylvania and Maryland school districts. In the first case, a six-year-old boy was suspended from school for pointing his finger at another tot and going “bang-bang.” Rumor has it he’s facing more serious charges now that it’s been discovered that his other fingers were loaded.

In Baltimore, a five-year-old girl who threatened another little girl, saying she was going to shoot her with a pink Hello Kitty toy gun that blows soap bubbles, was initially suspended from kindergarten for 10 days. But she had her punishment reduced to two days, thanks, no doubt, to a last minute stay of execution by the governor.

Only time will tell if these two little menaces will still grow up to be another Bonnie and Clyde, but at least nobody can accuse those school systems of not doing their level best to keep the world safe for gangbangers, psychos and jihadists.

Speaking of schools, it recently occurred to me that in my youth, criminals used to have to seek a safe haven by fleeing to countries that didn’t have extradition treaties with the United States. But, more recently, as we’ve seen with the tawdry likes of Angela Davis, Bill Ayers and Bernardine Dohrn, they only have to go as far as the nearest college campus.

Perhaps the last word on the phony war on guns -- the only kind of wars that liberals condone – came to me in a recent email: “Ban all gas tanks over five gallons. There is no reason on earth for people to have large capacity gas tanks except to run from the police in deadly high-speed chases.”
©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

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