Monday, December 30, 2013

THE MADNESS NEVER STOPS

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by Burt Prelutsky

You may have heard about the German Christian family that sought refuge in America because home-schooling is outlawed in Germany. Because the public schools in Germany are probably as bad as ours, except that, along with promoting secular socialism, they somehow manage to teach the kids how to read, write and do math, the parents refused to turn their children over to the state to be indoctrinated.

The Obama administration, which refuses even to enforce immigration laws when they involve young Latinos, is attempting to deport the family back to Germany, where the parents stand to lose custody of their children.

On the other hand, Obama’s uncle, Onyango, who has twice faced deportation back to Kenya, has now been given permanent resident status. The oddest thing about this story is that Obama claims he has never even bothered meeting his uncle. If true, the only reason I can come up with is that his uncle lives in Framingham, Massachusetts, which is clearly not one of those pricey resort areas favored by the Obamas.

An interesting sidebar is that Onyango insists that he has met Obama and that, in fact, his nephew actually stayed with him for three weeks while attending Harvard. Apparently, as some of us have long suspected, Barack Obama will lie about anything and everything just to stay in practice.

The Defense Department, aka the Pentagon, which has more fat in its diet than Rosie O’Donnell, has decided that the easiest way to deal with the cuts brought on by sequestration is by slashing military salaries and shutting down military commissaries. That would be like Bill Gates or Warren Buffet deciding to economize by stiffing waiters and waitresses.

I’m just a civilian whose tax dollars go to pay the bills, but I have what I consider a far better option. How about if we don’t send a few billion dollars to Afghanistan to help them fight the Taliban? After all, just how much worse could the Taliban be than Hamid Karzai and the various tribal leaders, who are so openly venal, so disgustingly corrupt, they would embarrass their fellow Muslims, if such a thing were humanly possible.

And if that’s not enough money to keep those commissaries open, it seems the State Department spends upwards of $500,000 a year on booze. That is one heck of a liquor bill, and you would think they could cut back on the sauce. On the other hand, it explains so much.

The other day, I spotted a bumper-sticker that read: “The power of love overcomes the love of power,” and attributed the quote to rock guitarist Jimi Hendrix. Hendrix, it should be said, was not only a druggie, but drank so much he could have gotten a job with our State Department. He was also prone to violence, which, I believe, is a good part of the reason that he received so much praise for his musicianship by people who think jackhammers are musical instruments. I mean, he played an electric guitar played at such an ear-splitting decibel level that you could listen to one of his concerts while residing in a neighboring city. The only reason that any of his fans aren’t totally deaf is because he died at 27, choking to death on his own vomit as a result of mixing booze and barbiturates.

But I grant that even degenerates can come up with nice words, such as those I saw on that bumper-sticker. But, after considering the cliché for a minute or so, I decided that, aside from small children wishing that every day were Christmas, even our wishes should be grounded in something verging on reality.

In what universe would you have to be to expect that the love of power would ever cease to exist? It’s not just the likes of Barack Obama, Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi, who lust for power. A year or so ago, I quit attending meetings of a conservative group here in L.A. because I could no longer put up with the group’s president, a woman who combined the very worst elements of Evita Peron, Nancy Pelosi and Hillary Clinton, while lacking their natural charm and warmth.

Furthermore, when I served on the Board of the Writer’s Guild, I had to deal with a Guild president who felt entitled to ride roughshod over those few Board members who objected to his left-wing agenda.

Now if even these sorts of minor entities are headed up by leaders who clearly take their lead from the late Benito Mussolini, it stands to reason that if you were to take that bumper-sticker seriously, you would have to be smoking the same shit as Jimi Hendrix.


©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

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Friday, December 27, 2013

BLACK INEPTITUDE

I'm sure that some of you feel guilty about reading three or four of my articles every week for free. Absolution is available by sending a donation to Burt Prelutsky at 16604 Dearborn St., North Hills, CA 91343-3604. PayPal also works.

Also, please check out the information on my radio show that is posted on my website.


by Burt Prelutsky

For several decades now, black Americans have been indulged like toddlers and treated like China figurines, and not just by liberals, although it seems to me it began under Lyndon Johnson, with Hubert Humphrey serving as the main enabler.

It was under LBJ that new welfare laws pretty much booted black men out of the house by denying welfare to black families if there was a male adult under the roof. As for Humphrey, he was the loon who said that if Affirmative Action led to racial quotas, he would sit down and eat the bill for breakfast. Inevitably, it led to quotas, and, naturally, as is always the case with a liberal’s promises, Humphrey never even ate a little crow.

The next thing we knew, black speech that replaces “are” with “is” and with “they be,” was being called Ebonics and was being referred to by black politicians like Maxine Waters and left-wing academics at our leading universities as merely a dialect, pretending that ignorance and illiteracy were every bit as acceptable as standard English.

These days, we see progressives pretending that the Knockout Game is a fantasy dreamed up by white conservatives to make black teenagers look bad. If you take a peek at crime statistics, the black illegitimacy rate and the school dropout numbers, you will quickly conclude that the only people who have to dream up anything are those who try to put a positive spin on the future of American blacks.

To make matters worse, a large number of blacks have become so dependent on government handouts that they continue voting for the same people in Detroit, Chicago, New York, Atlanta, Houston, L.A. and, most particularly, Washington, D.C., who have helped to keep them on their slummy urban plantations.

But it’s not just young blacks who should make us all ashamed of what has become of the descendants of those who comprised the so-called Greatest Generation. In the 1960s, possibly the worst decade in American history, young people considered themselves adults, while adults aspired to be kids – largely engaged with drugs, wife swapping and a bizarre tolerance for rock ‘n’ roll.

These days, youngsters not only have no hankering to be grown-ups, they actually seek to extend their adolescence into the foreseeable future. They actually believe that they’re entitled to remain on their parents’ health insurance policy until they’re 26 -- an age by which, in the past, a great many people had served in the military and were raising their own families -- but that there’s nothing shameful about living at home and cadging off their parents, possibly forever.

As if that’s not bad enough, in overwhelming numbers, they voted for Obama, the fellow who refers to twenty-somethings as kids and assures them they shouldn’t even be financially responsible for their own birth control pills. “Kids” is what he calls them to their face; behind their backs, in the tradition of other left-wing despots, he no doubt refers to them as “useful idiots.”

Speaking of he who should be impeached, the health insurance aspect of the Affordable Care Act is bad enough, but the real disaster will come in terms of future health care. For not only will people not be able to keep their doctors, but as more and more people wind up on Medicaid, they’ll be lucky to find any doctor willing to treat them because of the notoriously low reimbursement rates. But, then, how damn stupid do you have to be to have believed Obama in the first place when he vowed he would provide 30 million additional people with health insurance, and we would all wind up saving money?

Also, keep in mind that at the same time Obama, Pelosi and Reid, were shoving their satanic plan down our throats, polls showed that 80% of Americans were happy with the status quo. What do you think that number is today? And how much lower will it be when 60 or 70 million more Americans lose their employer-provided health care in 2014?

To give you some idea how dumb the typical voter is, a guy in Santa Monica, CA, was getting people to sign a petition ensuring that Karl Marx would be able to get on the presidential ballot in 2016. Playing fair, he even went so far as to say that Marx would be the candidate best able to continue Obama’s Communist agenda. Needless to say, he had no problem garnering signatures. So watch out, Hillary, Karl’s breathing down your neck.

In other news, although the liberals trivialize the 5% of Americans who have lost their health insurance policies thanks to ObamaCare -- a number that translates to six million policy holders, but about 20 million people when you factor in spouses and children -- they are constantly making a big deal of gay couples raising kids. They rhapsodize about them, write books about them and play up the new untraditional family on TV and in school textbooks. You would have reason to imagine that there are tens of millions of these households, probably a great many in your own neighborhood. The actual number is 100,000 homosexual couples in the entire country who have custody of a child. So while they casually pooh-pooh the 5% who have been victimized by ObamaCare, they laud and claim special consideration of the .0003% represented by this segment of the population.

According to a recent poll, two-thirds of Americans say they don’t trust other people. That’s pretty depressing. But perhaps the problem is with the way they asked the question. After all, considering that we Americans basically break down to half liberals and half conservatives, I would think that if they asked people if they trusted those who shared their values, the number would be close to 100%. As a conservative, I confess it’s only liberals I find entirely untrustworthy.

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

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For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

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Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
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Wednesday, December 25, 2013

SURROUNDED BY KNUCKLEHEADS

I'm sure that some of you feel guilty about reading three or four of my articles every week for free. Absolution is available by sending a donation to Burt Prelutsky at 16604 Dearborn St., North Hills, CA 91343-3604. PayPal also works.

Also, please check out the information on my radio show that is posted on my website.


by Burt Prelutsky

IF I were only as oblivious to the news as so many of my fellow Americans are, I have no doubt I would sleep a lot better than I do. For instance, when I bet on Mitt Romney last year, it wasn’t because I was unaware that Obama was leading in the polls, but because I couldn’t accept that in spite of a gruesome economy, a foreign policy that benefitted our enemies and harmed our allies, and a socialized medicine plan that would destroy the best health care system in the world, the electorate would ignore the evidence and re-elect Obama.

Proving it was no fluke, recent polls indicate that two out of three Americans think the treaty with Iran that gains us nothing, but serves to legitimatize their nuclear program and free up seven billion dollars that they can use to sponsor terrorism around the world, is reason to celebrate.

As cynical as I tend to be, even I find it frightening that so many millions of my fellow countrymen clearly have excrement for brains. In a way, this level of stupidity is truly breathtaking and, in a very bizarre sense, more impressive than anything else about Obama’s minions.

Although I like to think I have a well-developed sense of prescience, I can’t swear that I knew for certain that the fellow who heckled Obama when he was delivering his 498th speech about immigration reform was a plant, but I sure suspected that it was at least as non-kosher as a cheeseburger and didn’t smell nearly as enticing.

My suspicions were based on a few things. The first is that he was standing behind Obama, playing his role as a human prop. Nobody winds up serving as a background curtain who hasn’t been totally vetted. For another thing, nobody but a shill would be treated so patiently. As you recall, Obama, whose skin is thinner than a blade of grass, was the epitome of patience, encouraging the young man to vent so that he could sadly explain that there are some things even a despot can’t do without the cooperation of Congress. Never mind that none of those things include giving billions of tax dollars to his major contributors, postponing ObamaCare for unions and businesses or cutting deals with Iranian mullahs.

As it turns out, the heckler was a Korean named Ju Hong who had recently graduated from the University of California, at Berkeley, and is probably on Obama’s short list for judicial appointments. In the meantime, he gets to take his proud place alongside those young women who pretended to faint at Obama’s campaign stops in 2008, and whose great-grandmothers used to be paid by PR flacks to “swoon” at Frank Sinatra’s performances in the early 40s.

The amount of fraud perpetrated by Obama must make every conman in America gnash his teeth in envy. It even sets the bar high for his fellow politicians. But that doesn’t stop some from trying. Bill de Blassio, the new mayor of New York City, pretends that by eliminating the Stop and Frisk program devised and carried out by the NYPD under both Rudy Giuliani and Michael Bloomberg, civilization will make a belated return to Gotham. But, short of Batman coming out of retirement, Del Blassio has to know that the murder rate and overall crime rate will soar. But because he’s an old school leftie, he knows that in a city such as his, perception trumps reality, and that all of New York’s Jews and Puerto Ricans will regard the new policy as compassionate.

As an outsider, I can only hope that the inevitable victims will not be innocent tourists, but, instead, will be limited to the balmy liberals who elected this weasel. But, to be fair, they only voted for Del Blassio because Hugo Chavez, Che Guevara, Fidel Castro and Saul Alinsky, weren’t on the ballot.

The fact that even now so many academicians are touting the benefits of ObamaCare proves conclusively that as someone, possibly George Orwell, once observed, “There are some ideas that are so stupid, only an intellectual would take them seriously.”

Recently, in Sweden, a 65-year-old man was acquitted after being arrested for jacking off on a public beach. The court ruled that he had committed no actual offense because he wasn’t directing his activity at any one person in particular. I suppose, using that logic, Obama could actually beat the rap for the Affordable Care Act, but only, I trust, if he was lucky enough to have Judge Svenssen on the bench.



©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

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Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews: 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15. Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

You can now use PayPal to purchase my books or make a donation to BurtPrelutsky.com.

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Monday, December 23, 2013

"Obamacare: Our Very Own Titanic" and "Haunting the White House"

I'm sure that some of you feel guilty about reading three or four of my articles every week for free. Absolution is available by sending a donation to Burt Prelutsky at 16604 Dearborn St., North Hills, CA 91343-3604. PayPal also works.

Also, please check out the information on my radio show that is posted on my website.


by Burt Prelutsky

At the time Nancy Pelosi famously remarked that the Affordable Care Act would have to be passed before we knew what was in it, I didn’t realize that by “we,” she was including Barack Obama.

I should have guessed, though. After all, this guy is as lazy as that kid who always tried to hide out in the eighth grade by sitting in the last seat in the back row, praying never to be called on. It’s only right that it’s referred to as his signature piece of legislation because the only role this goofus played in creating this monster was signing it.

Although everything is still up in the air when it comes to ObamaCare in spite of the White House moving back one deadline after another and attempting to get insurance companies to break as many laws as Obama has, the fact remains that we could end up with 315 million people with health insurance, but with nary a hospital or doctor to treat them.

In one county in Florida, there will be only seven pediatricians for 260,000 children. All I know is that I wouldn’t want to be sitting in one of those seven waiting rooms. You know how cranky a five-year-old can get, especially after sitting there since he was a three-year-old.

At this point, I’m betting even Marcelas Owens, the 11-year-old black kid who was standing at Obama’s elbow when he signed the Affordable Care Act, wishes he’d yanked the pen out of Obama’s hand and stabbed Henry Waxman with it on his way out the door.

The truth is that between the ACA and the tax on medical devices, Obama is turning America into one huge African village. I expect we will soon see witch doctors with painted faces and bones stuck through their noses hanging out their shingles.

Speaking of health care, as some of you know, I was scheduled on Dec. 13th to have an operation on my wrist. But a pre-op EKG turned up a blockage in my main artery. That meant postponing the wrist operation for at least two months, so that they could perform an angiogram and implant a stent on Dec. 18th. As I sit here, that is still four days off.

Everyone is telling me it’s no big deal, which is what I am always ready to tell others who are about to undergo surgery. Actually, the only part of the procedure that I find rather unnerving is that the surgeon gets to the heart via the groin. That, to me, is like going from San Diego to L.A. by way of Baltimore. Besides, he will be going where no man has gone before, and, quite frankly, I was hoping to keep it that way.

Moving on: When you see Ukrainians toppling Lenin’s statue, demonstrating their hatred of their Soviet-era oppressors and of their Russia-loving president, Viktor Yanukovich, you wish you had an American president who would go there and give the equivalent of JFK’s pronouncement, on behalf of all freedom lovers, “Ich bin eine Berliner,” merely substituting Kiev for Berlin. But I would happily settle for a bunch of Ukrainians coming to Washington and toppling Barack Obama.

Have you noticed that the only time people pay the slightest bit of attention to atheists is in December, when they marshal their pathetic resources to attack Christians and their traditions? It’s my guess that the first words these self-righteous pinheads utter as they roll out of bed on December 1st, is: “Thank God for Christmas!”

Recently, when actor Paul Walker died while a passenger in a Porsche, it reminded me that James Dean died nearly 60 years ago while driving a Porsche. It also reminded me of a mystery that has long plagued me. In a country where it is generally illegal to drive over 65 miles an hour even on a freeway, why does anyone ever buy a Porsche? A Porsche, after all, does 65 backing out of the garage. To me, it’s like buying a mansion and then living in the cellar.

The best I’ve been able to come up with is that like a lot of foolish things that very rich people do, the answer is simply that they can. It must fall into the same category as spending $25,000 on a watch that’s going to tell you the same time as one that runs you $50 or spending $35,000 on a seat at an Obama fund-raiser that manages to combine bad food with lousy company.

Finally, Lincoln School in Canon City, CO, suspended six-year-old Hunter Yelton for kissing a little girl on the hand. That is the problem with having four-year-old school principals. Still, I can’t help wondering how the dunces at Lincoln would have handled the matter if the object of Hunter’s affections had been a little boy.

I just have a sneaky hunch they wouldn’t have been so quick to punish little Hunter, lest they risked traumatizing him for expressing his gayness.

As Napoleon, the swinish villain in George Orwell’s “Animal Farm,” put it, “All animals are equal. But some are more equal than others.”

HAUNTING THE WHITE HOUSE

Barack obama seems less and less like a president and more and more like a visitor from the spirit world. He looks real enough, but wouldn’t an actual human being be embarrassed if he had to keep saying that he didn’t know about things that were happening right under his nose? Can you even imagine being the commander-in-chief and claiming to be unaware of Operation Fast and Furious, electioneering at the IRS and what took place at Benghazi, until you read about it in the NY Times?

What compounds the problem is that his disciples claim Obama is the smartest guy in whatever room he happens to be in, and he obviously agrees, as one can tell by the arrogant tilt of his chin and the contempt he openly displays towards anyone who dares to disagree with him.

Ectoplasm is the supposed physical substance that results from psychic intervention, such as when a ghost shows up at a séance. One can’t help thinking that if Obama were ever called forth from the great beyond, the substance would be called egoplasm.

He is such an arrogant shmoe that when I first heard of the word “selfie,” I immediately thought of the lump in the Oval Office. Selfie, as I understand it, describes a new fad in which people snap photos of themselves, occasionally sharing the lens with friends or relatives, but just as likely to include only themselves, and then uploading the shots to Facebook and other social media.

It’s as if we’ve all turned into members of the paparazzi, but instead of shooting celebrities for profit, we’re shooting ourselves for reasons I can’t begin to fathom.

So just when I had concluded that the human race couldn’t possibly become more self-involved and annoying than it had over the past few decades, Obama came along and proved me wrong by setting the worst possible example. It all ties in to the fact that he has begun banishing news photographers from official functions, insisting that news agencies rely entirely on the White House photographer, who can be counted on to show the Obamas in the very best light.

The worst problem with Obama, his personal character flaws aside, isn’t that he stumbles from one crisis of his own making to another, leaving chaos in his wake, but that all Americans share the consequences, and not just the creepy 51% who re-elected this jackass in 2012.

His latest gaffe is the deal he had John Kerry cut with Iran, which gives that evil and backward nation a clear path to a nuclear bomb, plus seven billion dollars to do with as it likes. As I see it, the main difference between this disaster and the deal that Neville Chamberlain made with Adolf Hitler is that England’s prime minister didn’t roll over in order to distract attention from the horrors of ChamberlainCare.

As for Secretary of State Kerry, the only thing that can be said in his favor is that he is the only member of Obama’s administration who reminds anyone of both ends of a horse.

Moving on, whatever happened to the concept of equal rights? Instead, we have different groups referring to women’s rights, minority rights, gay rights, all of which are the antithesis of what many of us, including the Founding Fathers, regarded as equal rights for all Americans.

In the same way, “hate crimes” distinguishes between different classes of victims, thus ripping the blindfold off Lady Justice’s eyes, so that crimes against certain victims are punished more harshly than the very same crimes committed against other people.

In a nutshell, that’s what the left-wing nincompoops refer to as “social justice,” which turns the whole concept of justice on its head.

Finally, speaking of differences, it recently occurred to me that a singular division between the sexes is the way they react to put-downs. If, for instance, a man says something insulting about a specific woman, other women will often take it as a generic insult of all women, and label the guy a misogynist; however, if a specific man is insulted by either a woman or another man, the normal guy’s reaction is to nod and quickly add, “And what’s more, the schmuck cheats at cards.”


©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article: Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews: 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15. Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

You can now use PayPal to purchase my books or make a donation to BurtPrelutsky.com.

Click here to send money to BurtPrelutsky@aol.com. Don't forget to specify whether this is a donation, or a book payment with your address, and be certain to include the autograph instructions.



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Friday, December 20, 2013

DISASTERS SPROUTING LIKE MUSHROOMS

I'm sure that some of you feel guilty about reading three or four of my articles every week for free. Absolution is available by sending a donation to Burt Prelutsky at 16604 Dearborn St., North Hills, CA 91343-3604. PayPal also works.

Also, please check out the information on my radio show that is posted on my website.


by Burt Prelutsky

Only a stumblebum like Obama would think that signing an agreement with Iran that basically caves to an evil nation would be a good way to distract people from the catastrophe known as the Affordable Care Act.

Just because Obama can’t do two things at once – or even one thing if it requires anything beyond reading words off a Teleprompter – he assumes other people can’t recognize that he is as toxic on the world stage as he is domestically.

Because John (“Why do people keep calling me Mr. Ed?”) Kerry is as inept as his boss, in exchange for legitimizing Iran’s nuclear program and handing over seven billion dollars, he couldn’t even negotiate the release of American pastor, Saeed Abedani, who was trying to open an orphanage in Iran when he was arrested over a year ago, and subsequently tortured on trumped-up charges of being a spy.

It’s not just that Iran should never be trusted, but Obama, along with the representatives of the other western nations that signed the treaty, chose to ignore the fact that Iran has been the single largest sponsor of state-sanctioned terrorism for the past 34 years. The blood of every American soldier who has been killed or wounded in Iraq, Afghanistan or Libya, can be found on the hands of the Iranian mullahs. But in order to take some of the heat off himself, Obama chose to reward Iran for three decades of bad behavior. I wonder if Malia and Sasha have been paying attention.

I can only say that Hitler must be kicking himself for coming along 80 years too soon. Back in the 30s, Hitler only had to deal with a single Neville Chamberlain, and he would soon be replaced by Winston Churchill. Today, all the western leaders are carrying umbrellas, and there isn’t a Churchill in sight.

Reagan would have had the mullahs eating their centrifuges for lunch. But Obama goes on TV to brag about this foreign policy coup even as the Ayatollah Khamenei celebrates the signing of the pact by once again announcing his intention to annihilate Israel.

Meanwhile, in Afghanistan, Hamid Karzai is kicking sand in our face, and the government is talking about punishing those engaged in pre-marital sex with a hundred lashes, and, as a punishment for adultery, death by stoning. Keep in mind that we have squandered thousands of American lives and billions of tax dollars protecting these vermin from the Taliban. So, the next time someone suggests we go to war to protect Muslims and Arabs from one another, ask them why on earth we would ever do such a thing when it is clearly God’s way of thinning the herd.

When I heard that Israel’s Bibi Netanyahu said something about “an historic mistake,” I heartily concurred. But then I found out he was talking about the sucker’s deal we cut with Iran. He was right, of course. But, initially, I assumed he was referring to the elections that put Obama in the White House and then extended his lease.

There are times when it’s easy to imagine that all the lunacy can be traced back to our nation’s capital. But it’s just not so. For instance, it makes no sense that drug dealers face far harsher penalties than those who slaughter elephants. Even on those rare occasions when poachers are arrested and tried, the creeps involved in the ivory trade generally get off with a wrist slap. The elephants, after all, are innocent victims; whereas drug users are not. But because hypocrisy has become a way of life for many of us, we simply pretend they are.

The latest proof that college campuses are among the most corrupt venues in America is Bard College’s refusal to cut its ties with the Jerusalem-based Al-Quds University, even after the Palestinian administrators failed to condemn an Islamic jihad demonstration that included students trampling on Israeli flags and exchanging the Nazi salute. But, then, Bard, the pride of Annandale, NY, also boasts a Chair in Social Studies named in Alger Hiss’s honor. For the uninitiated, Hiss was a high-ranking member of the State Department under both FDR and Harry Truman, who just happened to moonlight as a Soviet spy. As some wag suggested, the big surprise is that Bard doesn’t have a John Dillinger Chair in Banking.

In case you were wondering, similar lunacy prevails in the education system below the college level. Verenice Gutierrez, the principal at the Harvey Scott K-8 School, in Portland, Oregon, has decided that her teachers shouldn’t make reference to sandwiches because in some cultures they don’t eat sandwich bread. Furthermore, on the first day of the school year, at a staff meeting, it was decided that the teachers should engage in a “Courageous Conversation,” in which they would examine news articles in class and discuss the “white privilege” they convey.

Because I’m a big proponent of both courage and conversation, I would suggest they devote one of those sessions to the Knockdown Game, currently the rage with black teens, in which the object of the game is to sucker punch a white person. Extra points, as I understand it, are earned if the victims are elderly women or World War II veterans.

I realize that it might be difficult to spot white privilege in these accounts, but I’m betting that Ms. Gutierrez is up to the task, and that an administrative position at Bard College is very likely in her future.


©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

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Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews: 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

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For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
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Wednesday, December 18, 2013

A NATION IN DECLINE

I'm sure that some of you feel guilty about reading three or four of my articles every week for free. Absolution is available by sending a donation to Burt Prelutsky at 16604 Dearborn St., North Hills, CA 91343-3604. PayPal also works.

Also, please check out the information on my radio show that is posted on my website.


by Burt Prelutsky

When people used to say “Only in America,” they intended it as praise, highlighting the promise that anyone – no matter his religion, his nation of origin or the circumstances into which he was born – could succeed in America beyond anyone’s expectation. But when you see a Marxist slacker like Obama twice elected to the highest office in the land, the words take on a cynical connotation, and are definitely no longer a compliment.

Speaking of Obama, it recently occurred to me that Obama’s grandparents did as rotten a job raising him, a lazy, pot-smoking, punk as they did raising his mother, their daughter, a certified dingbat with round heels and a flat head, who made a habit of looking for love, as the country song once put it, in all the wrong places.

As a result, it’s no surprise that Obama has shown far greater compassion for a handful of Democrats up for re-election next November than for the millions of Americans who have lost their health insurance. It continues to shock me that so many people still refuse to acknowledge that when he swore to fundamentally transform America, he fully intended to change America from being the shining city on the hill to being just one more unexceptional third world slum.

I have generally objected to presidential debates because I think they are a waste of time. For one thing, it is too easy for the moderators, who are generally liberals, to tip the balance, as Candy Crowley did in 2012 by siding with Obama when he was, as usual, lying about the Benghazi massacre; but also because debating skills are about as important to a president as the ability to play the accordion or knit a sweater. Once elected, the only person he’s ever likely to debate is his wife, and not even Ms. Crowley can save him there.

Speaking of presidential debates, considering the way that Obama has flip-flopped on such matters as same-sex marriages, the federal debt, the Patriot Act, the war in Afghanistan and the Senate’s nuclear option, a far livelier debate than any of those between Obama and Romney would have been one between Obama and himself.

That being said, thanks to Obama, things that were previously regarded as non-partisan – federal departments such as the IRS, the Justice Department and the Census Bureau –are merely adjuncts to the DNC, ready at a moment’s notice to do anything asked of them by this sleazy administration. As a result, they are now about as non-partisan as Jay Carney, David Axelrod and Valerie Jarrett.

Although the media has reported on the dismal rollout of ObamaCare, you can tell they didn’t have their heart in it. That’s why most of them were delighted to promote any narrative, no matter how bizarre, that he and his stooges concocted. For instance, even though it’s the Affordable Care Act that forced insurance companies to cancel individual policies, reporters and left-wing pundits were only too happy to tie a tin can to the insurance industry and blame them for the inevitable chaos.

On the chance that notion didn’t fly, the White House was ready with the excuse that the rollout would have been as smooth as glass if only those darn Obstructionists, formerly known as Republicans, hadn’t sabotaged the computer program.

If the Democrats keep it up, I may have to seek a restraining order against them. I feel as if I’m being stalked. Every time I turn on my computer, there’s yet another email from some mucky-muck in the party, each one addressed to “Friend.” Frankly, I had barely gotten used to hearing from all my friends in Nigeria, who wanted nothing more out of life than to send me millions of dollars. But now I find that in spite of all the nasty things I’ve written about liberals, even Barack Obama, Dick Durbin and Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, are ready to forgive and forget.

Even Harry Reid is ready to smoke the peace pipe. In November, he wrote simply to explain why he had exploded the nuclear option on the floor of the U.S. Senate, blowing up over two centuries worth of tradition. “Last Thursday,” he wrote, “Democrats stood up to reform the filibuster because we believe in democracy, not obstruction.”

Because it’s not my way to spit in the eye of someone who sincerely seeks my friendship, I didn’t write back to remind him that a few short years ago when the Republicans were in the majority and merely toying with the idea of utilizing the nuclear option, he had grumbled: “What they are attempting to do in this instance is really too bad. It will change this body forever. We will simply be an extension of the House of Representatives, where a simple majority can determine everything.”

As I see it, the real problem with the nuclear option is that, alas, it was merely a catchy term. If it had actually been an explosive device, we might finally have come up with a way to introduce long over-due term limits to Washington.


©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article: Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews: 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15. Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

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Monday, December 16, 2013

CHANNELING WILL ROGERS

I'm sure that some of you feel guilty about reading three or four of my articles every week for free. Absolution is available by sending a donation to Burt Prelutsky at 16604 Dearborn St., North Hills, CA 91343-3604. PayPal also works.

Also, please check out the information on my radio show that is posted on my website.


by Burt Prelutsky

Because it's been about 80 years since Will Rogers died in a plane crash, there are a lot of people who never heard of him even though he had been a major attraction in vaudeville, a movie star and a homespun columnist given to such observations as “The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets.”

But, to be fair, as wise as he was, Mr. Rogers never heard of ObamaCare. It’s also worth noting that when he uttered his most famous line, “I never met a man I didn’t like,” he had never met Barack Obama.

When he was a senator and the Republicans were in the majority, Obama, along with his liberal colleagues, Biden, Reid and Feinstein, insisted that if the GOP employed the nuclear option, meaning they would be able to make judicial appointments with just a simple majority of 51votes rather than a super majority of 60, it would be the act of tyrants and would knock the earth off its axis.

It seems that while the rest of us were worried about Iran obtaining and using a nuclear bomb, we made the mistake of taking our eyes off Harry Reid. I used to refer to the majority leader of the Senate as “the Mortician” because of the phony funereal tones he invariably adopts in his public pronouncements. Now it has become an even more appropriate nickname because of the way he’s gone about burying the rights of the minority members in the U.S. Senate.

Back in 2005, Sen. Obama said, putting words in George Bush’s mouth, “I’m going to interpret it this way or that way, however I like.” He went on: “This is part of the theory of George Bush, that he can make laws as he goes along. I disagree with that. I taught the Constitution for 10 years. I believe in the Constitution. I will obey the Constitution.”

The only thing I ever heard Obama say about the Constitution was that, like the Civil Rights movement, it fell short because it didn’t deal with the redistribution of wealth. But, then, Obama has changed his mind about a lot of things since moving into the White House. He decided, for instance, that the Patriot Act isn’t nearly as fascistic as he insisted it was when Bush was sitting in the Oval Office; that ObamaCare was so flexible that, on his mere say-so, businesses and unions were exempt from paying the same taxes as the rest of us; and that it’s not even slightly unpatriotic to raise the national debt from nine trillion dollars to 17 trillion dollars in five years, although he sure thought it was traitorous when the Republicans raised it from six trillion to nine trillion in eight years.

Recently, Obama hosted a sit-down with several of his fans in the media, so they could best decide how to put lipstick on the pig known as the Affordable Care Act. Just a few of the boobs he invited were Ed Schultz, Al Sharpton and Juan Williams. That’s some brain trust. Those guys don’t have a single working brain between them. I can only assume that Larry, Moe and Curly couldn’t make it to the meeting because they were busy elsewhere, poking each other in the eye.

But that’s what happens when you’re a narcissistic egotist who insists on being the smartest guy in the room. At some point, the other guys have to be so dumb they drool when they speak, and the room has to shrink all the way down to a closet.

Until everyone finally caught on to the fact that he lied and lied in order to shove ObamaCare down our throats, it was enough for his flunkies in the media to carry his water. But now that even the New York Times is beginning to catch on, it’s become a matter of bailing water to keep this administration afloat. But Obama is as water-logged as the Titanic, and not even Juan Williams has a bucket that large.

It’s worth noting that for over three years, while the Democrats danced around the Maypole, singing the praises of socialized medicine, it was known as “ObamaCare.” But, during the past few months, as we began discovering just how toxic it was, even Obama began calling his signature piece of legislation -- the thing that Joe (“Potty Mouth”) Biden once bragged was “a f---ing big deal” -- the “Affordable Care Act.”

But at the rate this thing is going south, don’t be too surprised if you wake up one day and find the New York Times and the sock puppets at MSNBC referring to it as BushCare.


©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article: Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews: 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15. Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

You can now use PayPal to purchase my books or make a donation to BurtPrelutsky.com.

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Friday, December 13, 2013

"Satan's Little Imps" and "I've Got EMail"

I'm sure that some of you feel guilty about reading three or four of my articles every week for free. Absolution is available by sending a donation to Burt Prelutsky at 16604 Dearborn St., North Hills, CA 91343-3604. PayPal also works.

Also, please check out the information on my radio show that is posted on my website.


by Burt Prelutsky

When I contemplate the damage being done to America, it’s difficult for me to imagine that it’s the work of mere mortals. Surely the Devil must have a hand in it. That notion ties in to my suspicion that Scratch must be working day and night to expand Hell to make room for all the left-wingers who will be taking up residence over the next 30 or 40 years. I suppose, if push comes to shove, he can always rent additional space in Detroit.

Generally, when a boss – be it of a company or a country – is constantly whining that he was unaware of a problem, be it harassment in the work place or, say, the IRS targeting millions of law-abiding Americans, unsafe working conditions in Benghazi or a catastrophic health care plan, he is either, one, lying or, two, surrounded by flunkies, whose main responsibility is to keep him out of the loop. But in Obama’s case, it’s never a case of either one or two; it’s always both.

Now we hear that Obama wasn’t satisfied ensuring his re-election by merely having the IRS acting as an arm, a strong arm, of Team Obama, but used the Census Bureau to cook the unemployment numbers to make it appear just before Election Day that he had managed to lower the rate from 8.1% down to 7.8%. The big surprise is that he didn’t have them lower the rate all the way down to 4.8% or even 2.8%. After all, he had already seen to it that people who stopped looking for jobs or simply signed on for disability weren’t included in the nose count.

Obama recently said, “I’m not stupid enough to go out a week before the launching of the Affordable Care Act website and announce it would work if I knew it wouldn’t.”
That begs the question: Just how stupid are you? Even Bo, the First Dog, knew back in March it would be a disaster because he read the reports you had apparently begun using as poopy pads. Besides, the question of your stupidity is really beside the point. The American people have grown accustomed to having stupid presidents, but being lied to on an hourly basis is a whole new experience.

Jay Carney, Nancy Pelosi and the rest of Obama’s flying monkeys keep telling us that ObamaCare is on track. What they neglect to mention is that another train is also on track, but headed in the opposite direction. The collision will rattle windows as far away as Sri Lanka, but, for Democrats, it will prove even more destructive, come the 2014 elections. For them, it will be a case of déjà vu, as they experience 2010 all over again.

This version of Waterloo must be as big a surprise to Barack Obama as the earlier one was to Napoleon Bonaparte. I mean, after the media had allowed him to skate on Operation Fast & Furious; spying on the AP; slandering Fox reporter James Rosen; using the IRS to beat up conservatives; letting four Americans get butchered in Benghazi and then covering it up in a way that must have made Nixon spin in his grave, while muttering “Why me?” Obama had every reason to believe he could have sodomized little Jay Carney in front of the Washington Press Corps and received a standing ovation.

Obama is not only a cancer, but he has metastasized through the entire Washington establishment. He is the reason that every department feels free to squander millions of tax dollars on frivolous conferences and bonusus for underachieving bureaucrats. Over at Homeland Security, a minor entity named Avo Kimathi, who made $116,000 last year, suggested that “In order for black people to survive the 21st century, we are going to have to kill a lot of white people.”

For openers, nobody named Avo Kimathi should be working for the federal government. For another thing, four months after he shared this revelation, he was still on salary. His punishment consisted of being placed on leave, which only meant he didn’t have to punch a clock to collect that $39,000. In the meantime, the agency claims to be investigating the matter. This is the same administration that claims to still be investigating Benghazi well over a year after a Muslim mob slaughtered Ambassador Chris Stevens, Sean Smith, Glen Doherty and Tyrone Woods, with nary a suspect in custody.

Closer to home, Obama presented Oprah Winfrey with the Medal of Freedom just a week or so after she called older Americans racists who “just have to die,” ignoring the fact that most of the racists in this country look a lot more like her than they do like me. Besides being nasty and racist, her remark displayed a monumental lack of gratitude. It was mainly those older white ladies, after all, who made her TV chat show such a rousing success and made her a billionaire.

I know I’m just dreaming, but wouldn’t it be refreshing if black liberals like Ms. Winfrey, Danny Glover, Samuel Jackson and Harry Belafonte, would confront white liberals who demean black conservatives like Clarence Thomas, Thomas Sowell, Allen West, Walter Williams, Tim Scott, Ward Connerly and Condoleezza Rice? But I suppose that’s as much a pipe dream as expecting Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson to condemn black punks for robbing, raping and attacking whites.

It recently occurred to me that the way his approval numbers have tanked, Barack Obama should sign up for Life Alert because he’s fallen and he can’t get up. On the other hand, the schmuck has become so accustomed to lying, we might as well just leave him there to rot.

Finally, referring to the 2009 furor over her wearing shorts aboard Air Force One back in 2009, Mrs. Obama now calls it her worst fashion faux pas. By way of explanation, she said, “Sometimes I simply forget I’m the First Lady.”

She doesn’t know how lucky she is. For the past five years, as God is my witness, I’ve devoted nearly every waking hour to trying to forget that unfortunate fact, and so far I haven’t even come close.


I'VE GOT EMAIL

Recently, a friend, Mel Calvert, suggested that in light of the fact that I respond to comments from my readers, it would be a good idea if I shared some of the exchanges with others. It seemed like a swell idea. The best thing about it is that, for once, I wouldn’t have to start from scratch.

(Inasmuch as I didn’t bother getting anyone’s permission to reprint their messages, I will either make up names or use their own designated tags.)

Ragweed wrote to say I should have included John McCain on a list of politicians who trample on the Constitution. I replied, “I am not, as you know, a fan of the nincompoop. The only good thing about him is that he has an (R) after his name, which means that Harry Reid only has a five-vote majority we have to overcome next year when it might otherwise be a six-vote margin.”

Old Desert Rat wrote: “I agreed with the paragraph in ‘The Piltdown Man Signs Up for ObamaCare” that reads, ‘Speaking of the Imposter in the Oval Office, it wasn’t that long ago that liberals used to insist that George W. Bush was avenging his father by going after Saddam Hussein. And yet they never mention the far likelier scenario that Barack Obama is avenging himself on his drunken, communist, father’s sworn enemies; namely, the white race, western civilization, Christians, Jews, all non-Muslims and capitalists.”

To which I replied, “I find it odd that so many people were ready and willing to psychoanalyze Clinton and Bush in terms of their relationship with their fathers, but adverse to do the same when it comes to Obama, who even went so far as to title one of his memoirs ‘Dreams of My Father,’ the very schmuck who abandoned him when he was two years old. Those dreams turned out to be our nightmares.”

Dick wrote: “What intrigues me, Burt, is how the statists in Hollywood are always condemning capitalism and promoting socialism, yet all are paid different amounts, depending on who the actor is. If they truly believed in socialism and equal distribution of wealth, then all actors, set designers, make-up artists, and everyone else working in the business, would be paid the same and live in the same size house.”

“Dick,” I responded, “Hollywood actors, writers, producers and directors, are for socialism for the same reason that D.C. Democrats are for ObamaCare. It doesn’t cost them anything, and it puts them in solid with their colleagues. One thing, though, that has never really made sense to me is why those who want all power to reside in the hands of the federal government, and not the states, are called statists, when logic would suggest they be called anti-statists or at least federalists or even dummies. It makes about as much sense as referring to conservative states as red, and left-wing states as blue.”

In response to “A Countdown to Armageddon,” Karen wrote: “I agree with you that governors make the best presidents, as they have executive experience and they know how to manage finances. However, I am very impressed with Ben Carson.”

I replied: “I like Dr. Carson very much, but he was a surgeon. I don’t think telling a nurse to hand him a scalpel constitutes executive experience. Maybe he could be the Surgeon General. Just being smart and conservative aren’t enough. Otherwise I would vote for myself before I’d vote for Dr. Carson.”

Harry wrote to say that Rubio and Cruz shouldn’t even be considered, not because they’re senators, but because “Their parents were not native-born Americans.”

I replied, “I always thought that restriction against the foreign-born was one of the weaknesses of the Constitution. Some of the most patriotic Americans are those who were born elsewhere, and therefore don’t take this nation’s exceptionalism for granted. They, better than most of us, are in a position to compare what it means to be an American, as opposed to being a Russian, a North Korean, a Cuban or even a Scandinavian.”

George wrote “Each state has two Senators elected to represent the state’s interests, and every member of Congress is expected to represent his district’s interests. They all sit in their respective house, grouped by party affiliation. The President, on the other hand, is elected by the entire country. He is elected to represent the interests of all the people. Thus, his leadership should be apolitical. President Obama hasn’t figured out that he is President, not still a Senator.”

“George,” I replied, “you’re overlooking the fact that the President, whoever he may be, is not freshly hatched. Because he was a governor or a senator and he had an (R) or a (D) after his name, and his campaign was financed by the RNC or the DNC or by others who had a partisan interest in the outcome of the election, it’s naïve to think he will be non-partisan. That doesn’t mean, though, that he is entitled to ride roughshod over the opposition as Obama has done.

“From Inauguration Day on, Obama has let it be known that he has no desire to be a unifier. Although it’s a notion to which he paid lip service when he was running for office, since being elected he has waged warfare, the likes of which haven’t been seen since the 1860s. He has sided with blacks against whites, gays against straights, atheists against believers, the poor against the middle class, Muslims against Christians, illegals against citizens, America’s enemies against her allies, and those who want the Second Amendment repealed against those who understand that the Second was essential in order to protect the First.”

As we go forth, friends, let our motto be: “Make Burt’s job easier. Write half his column for him.”


©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article: Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews: 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15. Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

You can now use PayPal to purchase my books or make a donation to BurtPrelutsky.com.

Click here to send money to BurtPrelutsky@aol.com. Don't forget to specify whether this is a donation, or a book payment with your address, and be certain to include the autograph instructions.



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Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Raw Sewage

I'm sure that some of you feel guilty about reading three or four of my articles every week for free. Absolution is available by sending a donation to Burt Prelutsky at 16604 Dearborn St., North Hills, CA 91343-3604. PayPal also works.

Also, please check out the information on my radio show that is posted on my website.


by Burt Prelutsky

It has been 50 years since John F. Kennedy was assassinated and, as a result, he and his untimely death have naturally received a huge amount of media attention. The problem, as I see it, is that the entire city of Dallas, Texas, continues to be tarred all these years later. For one thing, his assassin, Lee Harvey Oswald, was born in New Orleans. For another thing, what makes Dallas a pariah when no such labeling is attached to Memphis, where Martin Luther King was killed, or Los Angeles, the scene of Robert Kennedy’s murder?

The females who support Planned Parenthood, it seems to me, are either mutants or space aliens. How else to explain the fact they experience the same joy in an abortion that normal women find in the birth of an infant? Except for the way these faux females dress, they are very similar to the Arab and Muslim women who are in rapture when one of their offspring explodes a suicide bomb.

It recently occurred to me that it might be time to create a list of political comparatives. To get the ball rolling, I submit “as articulate as Nancy Pelosi,” “as civil as Alec Baldwin,” “as photogenic as (Henry Waxman) (Debbie Wasserman-Schultz),” as sane as Sean Penn” or “as truthful as Barack Obama.”

Speaking of which, there was a great deal of speculation as to why Obama snubbed the event celebrating the 150th anniversary of Lincoln’s delivering the Gettysburg Address. Some people were astounded, particularly in light of the fact that Obama has played up the Illinois connection to the 16th President, going so far as to be twice sworn into office on Lincoln’s own Bible.

I happen to believe that for once he was being totally transparent. After all, he has always done his best to avoid showing up at venues unless they were packed with college students, union members, welfare recipients or factories owned by his major campaign bundlers. When he showed up in St. Louis for an All Star game a few years ago, he even went so far as to be driven onto the field seated next to hometown legend Stan Musial in order to ward off the boo-birds.

So it figures that now, when he has been proven to be a serial liar, he’s not about to show up anywhere he was likely be heckled or where thousands of average Americans just might channel their inner Joe Wilson and holler “You lie!” at this pathetic excuse for a human being, let alone a President.

In case you’ve been wondering why Democrats are always so anxious to raise the minimum wage, it’s not just because it plays well with their base, making them look compassionate even though the reality is that each increase means fewer jobs for the unskilled; it’s also because union contracts often contain riders that are tied to the minimum wage and automatically kick in, forcing employers to hike their pay. So any time you hear a union leader bloviating about worker solidarity, the appropriate response is to hit him with a crowbar.

The inevitable failure of the Affordable Care Act was obvious to anyone who ever saw the Soviet Union in action. Joseph Stalin was always announcing massive five-year plans, but whether they dealt with agriculture, construction or industrial productivity, the one thing you could always count on was abject failure. That’s because government bureaucrats are invariably incompetent. No amount of Stalinist speeches or NY Times propagandistic editorials could conceal the fact that the despot’s various commissars had no idea how to plant or harvest wheat, erect apartment buildings or build tractors. All they knew how to do was to announce quotas, lie about meeting them, and compete for favor with other petty officials.

Speaking of those who should be hanging from lampposts as an example to others of their kind, in just one recent three month period, the commissars at the EPA proposed 6,000 new regulations. We know these louts never think, but do they also never sleep? That’s 67 regulations a day, including weekends. This is the same EPA that is so inept that even environmental zealots have complained that the agency’s ethanol policy is entirely responsible for destroying millions of acres of conservation land.

Although I was initially upset with John Roberts for providing the necessary vote to green light ObamaCare, I then decided that he simply hoped to avoid getting the Supreme Court entangled in yet another Roe v. Wade type controversy, assuming, as I did, that the people could easily resolve the problem a few months down the road by electing Romney.

But, now as we see Obama’s popularity plummeting like a rock and congressional Democrats behaving like rats abandoning a sinking ship, with even worse to come for Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi as we get closer to the 2014 mid-term elections, I would like to personally apologize to the Chief Justice and, furthermore, suggest that Republicans honor him as Man of the Year. He has surely done more for the future of the GOP than Ted Cruz, Rand Paul, John Boehner, Mitch McConnell, Chris Christie and Marco Rubio, put together.

Finally, by this time, I expect you are all aware that Toronto’s mayor, Doug Ford, has admitted to misconduct involving booze, crack cocaine and prostitutes. But what you may not know is that Mayor Ford is, of all things, a conservative.

All I can say is, holy cow -- can you imagine what Canadian liberals must be like?!

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

Don’t miss a single article: Subscribe to BurtPrelutsky.com by email.

Enjoy Burt’s latest collection of interviews: 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die.

Get your personally autographed copy of 67 Conservatives You Should Meet Before You Die for $30, Barack Obama: You're Fired! for $25, or Liberals: America’s Termites for just $15. Or get all three for just $50! (All prices include postage & handling.)

For more information about these titles, including special combination and multiple copy discounts, visit Burt’s Bookstore.

To order by mail, send your check to:

Burt Prelutsky
16604 Dearborn St.
North Hills, CA 91343-3604

You can now use PayPal to purchase my books or make a donation to BurtPrelutsky.com.

Click here to send money to BurtPrelutsky@aol.com. Don't forget to specify whether this is a donation, or a book payment with your address, and be certain to include the autograph instructions.



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Monday, December 9, 2013

Dinosaurs, Planets & Obama

I'm sure that some of you feel guilty about reading three or four of my articles every week for free. Absolution is available by sending a donation to Burt Prelutsky at 16604 Dearborn St., North Hills, CA 91343-3604. PayPal also works.

Also, please check out the information on my radio show that is posted on my website.


by Burt Prelutsky

Liberals are always given to landing on the side of what they insist is science, whether the topic is Darwin’s Theory of Evolution versus Intelligent Design or man’s ability to control the weather. That’s because they believe that scientists are, like themselves, much smarter than other people.

But the fact is that science, to put it as kindly as possible, is an imperfect science. Scientists are, after all, people. They are therefore as prone to being affected by greed, blind ambition and even ignorance, as any of us.

For instance, for a great many years, they believed the Piltdown Man was the missing link. Instead, it, not he, was a rather clumsy hoax. We also had Pluto, which for a long time, was regarded as one of the planets in our solar system. Then, without warning, Pluto woke up one morning to find it had been demoted to the status of a plutoid.

And how many people are even aware that the Brontosaurus apparently never even existed? Unlike the Piltdown Man, it wasn’t an intentional fake. Instead, anthropologists mistakenly mixed up a few bones. What it was actually was something called an Apatosaurus. It doesn’t make much difference to most of us, but it obviously did to scientists because whereas Brontosaurus translates to “thunder lizard,” Apatosaurus means “deceptive lizard,” which, coincidentally, is how many of us refer to Obama.

Some would say that at least scientists eventually get around to correcting their mistakes. But until they do, they defend their beliefs by belittling doubters, generally labeling them as flat-earthers. These days, you see many climatologists defending “climate change” as settled science, while the rest of us are supposed to ignore the fact that consensus is not the same thing as proof, especially when those with the courage and integrity to raise doubts are punished by being denied federal grants and tenure.

Recently, I received an email that read “Friend -- I want to cut through the noise and talk with you directly about where we’re headed in the fight for change. That’s why I’m getting on the phone with OFA (Organizing for Action) supporters. Will you join me? I have just over three years left as president – and there’s a lot left on my to-do list. So let’s talk about how to make it happen. Thanks – I can’t wait to catch up. Barack.”

Needless to say, I didn’t take the call. I was busy walking my dog. What I’d like to know, though, is who the hell decided I was an OFA supporter. And where the heck did Pinocchio get off calling me “Friend”?

In the wake of all the lies Obama told us about the Affordable Care Act, I’ve been wondering if Michelle is beginning to suspect Barack might have been hedging his bets when he said: “I take you to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part. Period!”

My regular readers know that I am constantly lambasting conservative parents who keep paying out good money so that their offspring can be indoctrinated by left-wing professors, and after four years, ending up with the same marketable skills that they had when they got out of high school. But, sometimes you discover that the colleges can be every bit as profligate with your money as the tax-gobbling bozos in Washington.

For instance, not too long ago, the University of Oregon invited Dan Savage to deliver an address. Like most of you, I had never heard of the guy until then. But, apparently, he is famous in some circles as a gay activist. The point of his appearance was to describe in graphic fashion such perversions as fisting, and to answer any questions the youngsters might have about the various practices.

It gets worse. Although the venue only allowed seating for 300 students, the university didn’t think twice about paying him $24,000. Don’t bother doing the arithmetic; it works out to $80-per-student. But inasmuch as they’re raking in $24,334 a year for in-state enrollees and $44,359 if he or she is from out of
state, they could easily afford his fee. No doubt the administrators considered that a small price to pay to prove to the kids that they weren’t just a bunch of up-tight fuddy-duddy academics.

Recently, a friend sent me a poll that indicated that when it came to Healthcare, Obama’s approval rating was 37%; the Economy (31%); Immigration (32%); Terrorism (51%); Foreign Policy (34%); and Overall Job Approval (41%). He concluded by saying that added up to six “F’s” and wondered how the Left would spin those catastrophic numbers.

“No problem,” I replied. “They will merely say that when it comes to those all-important issues, 226% of the people are behind Obama.”

©2013 Burt Prelutsky. Comments? BurtPrelutsky@aol.com.

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