Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Understanding Islam

For a long time after 9/11, a great many non-Muslims felt compelled to read the Koran to better understand the enemy. Even back then, I knew that was a waste of time. If you want to know the heart of a person, you don’t need to read a book or even figure out how he thinks, you just need to know how he behaves.

That was the reason that I have never bothered trying to distinguish good Muslims from bad ones. Although I knew that only a relatively small percentage of them would blow up a school bus or kill someone because they had drawn a depiction of Muhammad, I also knew that a majority of them in the Middle East celebrated the destruction of the Twin Towers and the murder of 3,000 Americans.

I also knew that even after that massacre, a great many American Muslims were contributing to the terrorists in Hamas and Hezbollah until the FBI put to a stop to it. It was also no secret that Muslim clerics were in our prisons converting prisoners, usually black ones, to their vile cult. Furthermore, I knew that American Muslims were plotting mischief in their mosques and that, instead of placing a bounty on Osama bin Laden’s head, they were whining about being profiled.

That is why I would counsel Israel to never enter into a deal with those sworn to kill all the Jews. As for pandering to so-called world opinion, Israel should never even consider it. Most of the world hates Jews, but the existence of Israel provides them with cover. It allows people like Vanessa Redgrave, Emma Thompson and the administrators at a great many American universities to pretend it’s Israeli national policies they find objectionable, when in reality the only policy they really oppose is the one that calls for self-preservation.

The reason that so many creeps in Europe and America respond to the siren’s call of ISIS is because for many, license to kill and pillage is irresistible. As we all know, it is far more difficult to build than to destroy, and the path of least resistance is always going to appeal to a certain number of people, whether they’re in Ramadi or Baltimore.

In the meantime, we have a man in the Oval Office who only objects to going to war with Muslims, but would delight in decimating Republicans, whom he regards as more dangerous and a far greater threat to all he holds dear than a bunch of savages burning and beheading Christians in the name of Allah.

China has conducted several successful cyberattacks on our government, on our corporations and even on our citizens, managing to steal our military and industrial secrets, along with personal information about millions of us.

But in spite of what some people think, we haven’t been asleep at the switch. In retaliation, our State Department can proudly boast that we now possess the recipe for authentic mushu chicken, Shanghai shrimp and hot and sour soup.

To the age old question as to whether a glass is half full or half empty, Michael Bloomberg and his environmental minions would simply insist that your glass is twice as large as it should be, and would flog you for using it.

One of my readers, Karl Jenkins of Scottsdale, AZ, wrote to me recently to report on his recent visit to his physical therapist. When she told him that because her name is Caitlyn, she’d recently been the brunt of a great many Bruce Jenner jokes, he asked her if she thought Jenner might be mentally impaired. She said: “No, I think he’s brave.”

He then posed the following scenario: “Before I come in next time, I’m going to call you and say that I am now a cat. When I arrive, I want a litter box in the corner. I want everyone to call me ‘Kitty.’ During therapy, I want my back scratched. I’m also going to declare myself female, so I’d like all staff members to refer to me as ‘she.’ I’d also like you to call me brave.

“If I did all this, would you think I was mentally ill? Without a moment’s hesitation, she replied: ‘Yes, I never thought of it that way.’

“I reminded her that no matter what Bruce Jenner does to himself, a DNA test will always reveal the truth. Yet the media tries to convince us that he’s perfectly sane, and that we should lie to our children and tell them to lie as well.”

What’s more, Barack Obama, who knows less about courage than I do about Sanskrit, has told us that Bruce Jenner is courageous, just as he insisted was the case with basketball player Jason Collins and football recruit Michael Sam, when they outed themselves. And yet he never felt impelled to say the same about American sniper Chris Kyle, who spent years risking his own life in order to protect the lives of his fellow soldiers.

As a side note, it’s worth mentioning that Jenner is the very first Republican about whom Obama has ever said a kind word.

I believe it is the endless repetitions of videos showing incidents in places like McKinney, Texas, that makes everyone believe we are having an epidemic of cops misbehaving. When you combine the videos that are run incessantly even on Fox along with race pimps like Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson and Marilyn Mosby, inciting the brainless black mobs, it doesn’t take much to set our cities ablaze.

If the Justice Department and the White House weren’t part of the problem, these people would all be in prison along with the creep who, in spite of knowing there’s not a whiff of smoke in the crowded theater, nevertheless hollers “Fire!”

I have long subscribed to the belief that among the most important influences in determining how a person will turn out is his last name. Some names are just so imposing that it is nearly impossible to imagine that Churchill, Hemingway and Rembrandt, wouldn’t make their mark on the world.

But a name needn’t have nine letters, which, coincidentally, “Prelutsky” just happens to have, to facilitate success. For instance, I don’t think Walt Disney would have been nearly as successful if he’d had a different moniker. What he had was a perfect name for someone involved with cartoons and animation. “Disney” almost sounds like it could have been the name of one of Snow White’s dwarves, along with Dopey, Sleepy and Sneezy.

I mean, what if his name had been Gustav Schmidlapper? Would people be equally excited about visiting Schmidlapperland? Hardly. And would Schmidlapper World still be the happiest place on earth? I think not.

©2015 Burt Prelutsky. Comments?